after+a+rainy+night+1

page three “It would be incredibly complicated to do as well.” I kept going. “And both people have to be present to tie the knot, both have to give their consent.” I said. I grabbed Sam and thought Rya grabbed my shoulder and went back to my body. Sam came back but when we looked to Rya, she still hadn’t come back. Sam panicked. I kept my head. He was already off of me and going to get the shaman, so I focused on my spirit. I went got back out of my body and saw Rya looking incredibly confused and frightened. I grabbed her hand and went back into my body. She sat right up and glared at me. “I thought you were coming with!” I said to her. She shook her head and sighed. At the exact same moment the shaman came in. “It’s fine Sam; I got her back.” The shaman laughed. The voice was different. I looked up and saw that it wasn’t Sam. Sam came in behind him, looking slightly guilty. I looked between the two of them for a moment and Rya stood up. Sam was taking a step toward me and Rya tripped him. It was subtle if you weren’t expecting it but I was. Sam landed almost on top of me. I threw air at her and she was almost lifted off of her feet. The shaman watched us with wide eyes. “Is that your dad?” I whispered into Sam’s ear. He nodded. He rolled over so that he wasn’t lying on his stomach and sat up. I sat up and a serious wave of vertigo hit me. I almost cracked my head on the ground but Sam grabbed me before I did. Everything was swirling around me and I let him hold me for a moment. He set my head in his lap and started an educated discussion with his father about what could be wrong with me. After a minute I sat up again. The vertigo was gone and now I was seriously hungry. I got up and walked out. Sam came up behind me. “You’re supposed to tell me where you’re going.” He said to me irritant. “I’m going to find food of some sort.” I responded. Then I realized I was craving some salt. “Actually, can I borrow the keys to the car?” I asked him. He grabbed my wrist and spun me around. “I can’t let you do that.” He said. “Why not?” I asked him completely confused. He saw my confusion and he got confused. “Why do you need the keys?” He asked me. “I really want some McDonalds.” I responded. He laughed and loosened. “Well, in that case, yeah than we can go.” I grinned and turned around and then I spun back around and threw my arms around him and kissed him. He froze and gently broke free. At my hurt expression he whispered in my ear, “My dad didn’t even know I had a girlfriend, he’s definitely not going to react well to that.” I laughed. “Wouldn’t he find out fast in this village?” I whispered back to him. “Actually, his circle of people didn’t really pay attention to that kind of stuff. They think it’s beneath them.” I blushed and looked over his shoulder at his father. His face was completely shocked to the point of traumatization. I doubled up with laughter. Sam looked over his shoulder and winced. I was laughing so hard tears were running down my face. I pulled out my phone and took a picture. After the flash Sam’s dad snapped out of it. Sam grabbed my phone and I grabbed it back. Then it was war. We fought over the phone for fifteen minutes and then the phone wasn’t in either of our hands. “Young lady, who do you think you are?” Sam’s dad asked me. He went and found the picture and started laughing but he deleted it anyway. Sam was already off of me and it looked like he was going to try and escape, but I told the earth to grab him. It surrounded his feet and dragged him back over to me. “Did you really think you were going to get away with me having to make all of the explanations?” I snapped at him. He guiltily stared down at his feet. I turned and ran off toward the showers and Sam grabbed my shirt. I was midstride and my thin shirt ripped down the seams. We both stared shocked at my shirt and I turned around and smacked him hard. He acted as if he hadn’t noticed. He was staring at me and my tank top like it was the worst possible thing in the world. I rolled my eyes and headed back to the hut and grabbed one of Rya’s dresses. I found some leggings and put those on too. Sam and his father burst into the hut as I was trying to zip up the back of my dress. “Sam, zip this, will you?” I asked him not seeing his father. Sam came up and zipped it. “Your dad doesn’t like me much so far, does he?” I asked Sam. “I don’t understand who you think you are right now, no.” His father said. He surprised me so much that my legs parted in a fighting stance right away. Spirit was swirling around me. He saw my shocked expression and laughed. “I’m not going to hurt you,” He assured me. My knees gave out under me and I landed on the mat. I begged Sam with my eyes and he sat next to me. I curled into him and I couldn’t deal with it anymore. I pulled away from him, and focused on my spirit. As I left my body I saw my head hit his lap and I watched his eyes bulge. His father nearly panicked but Sam told him what was happening. His father didn’t understand, but Sam didn’t either. I looked at myself and found my aura was a nervous purple. I realized I was running and the anger rose in me in a way that I couldn’t handle and I was forced back into my body. I sat straight up and they both looked at me obviously looking for explanations. I stood up and shook Sam’s father’s hand. “I’m July.” I told him. “Who are you though?” He asked me getting frustrated. “I am this generation’s protector.” I said confidently. He looked at me with shock. “I am the shaman right now, and my son is going to be the next shaman.” He said. I stared at Sam and he looked determined. I could tell he wanted that with everything in him. “I need to teach him of spirits and he has not shown up to his lessons for the past few days.” He looked at his son suspiciously and I realized I was becoming a source of unrest in their family. I offered my hand to him and I moved my foot so it was touching Sam. “Uh, I’m just gonna go to my class.” Sam said getting up quickly and pulling his father with him. I gave him a questioning look as he left and he mouthed ‘later.’ I nodded and changed and left my hut. I went and found Rya. “So, you wanted to train?” I asked her, though she was talking to her friends. She raised her brows. “Are you having a ‘lover’s quarrel’ with Sam?” She asked teasingly. I punched her arm. “No, his dad came and stole him.” I responded. She grinned. “Oh knock it off or I’ll knock you off your feet,” I said grinning. “See you guys later.” She said to her friends. She led me to Qwen. “Where is Isaiah?” She asked him. “Out with his girlfriend again; I’m surprised the chief hasn’t yelled at them yet.” He answered. I’d been so caught up in my life that I hadn’t even thought of Isaiah. This news shocked me, but I didn’t mind. “Then we’re gonna go separate them.” I said grinning. I used the link between him and Qwen to find him. They followed me astonished. “You really know how to use mental links to your advantage don’t you?” Qwen said. “I’m connected really close to spirit and mind and spirit go hand in hand. I’ve really gotten to know the mind in my adventures outside my body.” I told him. I found the hut that they were in and I didn’t even bother to knock. I walked in on the both of them seriously making out. I cleared my throat. The girl looked up and glared. “You have no right to be in here.” She said kinda pissed. Isaiah had hung his head and looked embarrassed, but he didn’t know who it was yet. “I have as many rights around this village as you do.” I said to her imitating her voice. It was eerily accurate. She looked slightly frightened for a moment. “Do you know her?” She asked Isaiah. He turned and looked at me. “Come on. I’ve been hanging out with my boyfriend too much too. We have to train sometime soon.” I said to him. He introduced us and she looked a little less pissed when she found out who I was. She let him go but before she let me go she asked one question. “Who are you dating here in the village?” She asked trying to make connections. “Sam.” I said. “The shaman’s kid? Wouldn’t that be kinda awkward with you being all elemental and him being all spirit-y?” She asked me. “You’d be surprised at how close I am to spirit.” I said. She rolled her eyes. So we all went and trained for the rest of the day. When we went to dinner, the first thing I did was find Sam. He was talking to the chief’s daughter. I launched myself at him and he caught me happily. I kissed him and we just sat there like we hadn’t seen each other in weeks and Sam’s girlfriend just stared at us. I closed my eyes and held him tight. We went to get our food and it was just like before, completing each others’ movements. We sat down and Isaiah sat with us. His girlfriend followed him when she saw him. I snuggled into Sam and he kissed my forehead. “Stay here for a minute.” He told me. When I got up to follow him he pointed at the table and gave me a no arguments look and I sat back down and pouted. Isaiah stared at both of us wide eyed. I’d never followed directions like that before. Sam came back with his mom and dad. I blushed and stared down into my lap. Sam put his fingers under my chin and made me look up until I saw his eyes. I melted right there on the spot. I could feel the love between us deepen in that moment. Somebody cleared their throat. I looked away blushing furiously. His parents were looking at us with amused expressions. Sam sat down with me and I tried to get up and run. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down. I glared at him and he stared me down. I could feel my eyes going red. He didn’t show any sign of fear. My wrist started burning but he only let go of me. His stare intensified. I knew when I’d lost a fight and I could tell I’d lost. I crossed my arms and wouldn’t look at him. “I guess she’s going to be stubborn then. I’ll have to introduce you when she cools off.” He said to his parents. Rya was suddenly beside me. “She’ll be polite or she’s gonna have her butt kicked.” She said to them. I elbowed her in the stomach and I hit her in just the right spot and she doubled up gasping. I looked behind me and she slapped me hard. I could feel her wedding ring sting the side of my cheek and knew it was bleeding. I turned around and made myself look utterly bored. Sam’s parents looked shocked and worried. When the blood got to the dress I realized how bad it was bleeding. “Well, that’s annoying.” I said aloud. “Did I hurt you at all?” Rya demanded. I called the elements to me and healed myself. “Not a mark.” I said with a smirk. Everybody at the table just stared at me. Most of them with wonder and awe, but Rya just looked pissed. She huffed and walked away. I almost laughed but knew that I shouldn’t ruffle her feathers anymore than they already were. I grinned though. Sam just held his head like he had a headache. “Does it hurt?” I asked him. “Yeah, I get migraines sometimes.” He said. Since I’d already called the elements to me, I reached out touched his face. //Heal him.// I told them. I watched as his face visibly relaxed. He opened his eyes and his smile was intimately loving. He got up and I finally got up. “I’m July, this generation of protector. It’s nice to meet you two.” I said shaking his parents’ hands. They looked like they wanted to talk to me, but they could see how tired both of us were. We headed to the hut and right away I tore off the dress. He stared at me in shock. I took off my leggings and searched my bag for my pajamas. They had not so mysteriously disappeared again. The chief’s daughter chose that moment to walk in. She saw me mostly naked and him just staring at me and walked right out. I poked my head out the door. “What’s your name?” I asked her. “Jenny.” She said back. “Okay, it was bugging me that you knew my name and I didn’t know yours.” I said to her. She grinned. “No, it’s not what you think. Somebody hid my PJs again.” I said to her. She just rolled her eyes. I came back inside and Sam was still staring at me. “Oh, get over it.” I said to him. He shook his head as if to clear it and began searching for his pajamas. “Um… my pajamas have disappeared.” He said. I even looked for my too tight pajamas and they weren’t there either. He’d taken off his pants to change and he’d searched his bag and now he was searching the rest of the hut. We were both sitting in the same room in our underwear. It was starting to get awkward. I pulled on my jeans again and he pulled his on too. I found a tank top and threw that on too. He followed me out of the hut. I went over to Rya’s hut and banged on the door. When she opened the door still half asleep I said to her, “If you don’t give me my pajamas I’m gonna kill you.” She woke up and looked at me and my black tank top and jeans and laughed. “You can’t hurt me. I’m a memory.” She said and slammed the door in my face. I searched out Qwen in the men’s hut and asked him where our pajamas were and he laughed. I went back to the hut and all of my clothes had disappeared. All of Sam’s clothes were gone too. I went and found Maggie and asked her. She just laughed. I asked everybody and they all laughed. After asking Isaiah I got an idea. I walked out and left the village. “Sam, do you have the keys?” I asked him. He caught on fast. He grabbed them out of his pocket and got in the drivers’ side. He drove me home. I went in and grabbed a duffel bag. I stuffed the first clothes I got my hands on in it. When I got out of the house I hopped in and he drove to his house. He got in and ten minutes later he had clothes to last him a while. He started driving back to the village. “Can we go get some McDonalds?” I asked him. He grinned and pulled up to the nearest one. I ate my meal and then I grabbed my duffel and looked for some pajamas. I had my silk ones and I got really excited. They were my favorite pajamas. I crawled in the back and got dressed in them. I grabbed the wheel and Sam climbed in the back to do the same thing. He got in the passenger seat and got comfortable. When we were back at the village I asked him if he trusted me. “Yeah, of course I trust you.” He said. He had a good hold of his bag and I had a good hold of mine. I grabbed his hand and spirited us all the way back to the hut. I opened the earth and hid our bags. I crawled into bed totally content. He pulled me against him and he rubbed my back. I could tell he liked the silk. I grinned and fell asleep quickly. When we woke up we were snuggled into each other so thoroughly that neither of us wanted to move. “What-How?” Rya stuttered. I grinned at her without moving my head. “I win.” I said. She stomped out of the hut. Sam traced my back with his hand, enjoying the feel of my PJs. I was so happy I almost didn’t notice his parents walking in. They were both shocked to see us in the same bed. They immediately thought the worst of course. The light from outside was so annoying and I hid my face in Sam’s neck. Then this old guy came in. I sat up groggily. “What is this, Grand Central Station? I’m trying to sleep. Chasing your clothes around the world till midnight is tiring.” I fell back onto the pillow completely against my will. Their faces were all stricken with disgust. //Rya, make them go away.// I begged her through my mind. She saw what was going on and panicked. She was in the hut in less than thirty seconds. “We hid their clothes to pull a joke on them. It was nothing more than that.” She explained. They weren’t up for listening to us. I tried to calm my beating heart and I ended outside my body with Sam. “Oops.” I said to him. I was about to bring us back when he stopped me. He grabbed his sash and he grabbed mine. I knew what he was going to do and I nodded. He tied them together in a firm knot. I hugged him hard and we went back to our bodies. I cried into his shoulder and they all stared at me with pure bafflement. “Oh, so you’re crying because you’re going to get punished? You don’t even know what it is yet, but you don’t like punishment, do you?” The chief said. I got up and I left the hut. I ran and I ran. I knew I was going to hurt him if I stayed around him any longer. //They want to forbid us to be together.// I heard Sam’s voice in my mind. I hit the ground with a sickening crack. It just rushed up toward me faster than my arms could catch me. I woke up with Sam holding me. When I saw him I started crying. //Rya, we tied the knot. We’re bound and they want to separate us. Help me,// I begged her. She was suddenly beside me. Her eyes were wide with fear for me. “It’ll kill me. It’s a spiritual thing and I’m more than half spirit now.” I whispered to her. “You are forbidden to see him.” His father said to me. Something in me broke and my spirit was forced from my body. His father had been touching Sam and when Sam came to the other world he was brought along. Rya was there with me as well. Our sashes were such a deep red it hurt, but now they were decorated with tulips and roses. When his father saw us, he gasped. There was a sash binding us together. I couldn’t think right. “July, focus on your body.” Sam said. He grabbed his father’s hand. I focused on my body and we were back into our bodies. //Rya if I can’t be with him, kill me.// My eyes begged her with a hurt so deep I wanted to cry out but it hurt so much that I couldn’t. She shook her head. “I won’t. It’s not worth it.” She told me. //It’s not worth living without him.// I whispered to her through my mind. She could feel how I felt about him. She cried out. She clutched her rib cage. “Stop! That…it’s too strong for a memory to bear! Stop!” She nearly screamed at me. I saw a ripple in her appearance and I hurt even worse. If I lost my best friend and Sam, I would kill myself. She screamed. They all looked at me with horror. I slipped into unconsciousness with a sweet abandon. I didn’t want to feel anymore. “They tied the knot. I don’t understand why they would do something so extreme so soon. He should know better than that.” Sam’s dad said. “How? They need a tribal leader to give them permission.” Another man’s voice said. “They are tribal leaders in their own rights. The fact that they can get to the spirit world shows their power among the tribe.” Sam’s dad said. “The tribe has known of her for two weeks! How can she have power like that already?” The other man asked. “Because I’m going to fight a demon to save this tribe and they know that Rya is the only protector that can beat me. And she is a memory.” I answered his question. “Do you know what you’ve done?” Sam’s dad demanded of me. “I know what it is better than you do.” I said to him. “And what happens when you start to hate each other? It will hurt to break this.” He responded. “Your threat to separate us was too much for Rya to handle. The pain almost eliminated her, and she wasn’t getting the feeling directly. It wasn’t even her emotion. I know the pain already.” I said to him. “The pain threw me out of my body, threw me into the spirit world. But I won’t ever stop loving him. I was so deep I knew I wouldn’t and the feeling was mutual. We won’t ever want to take it back.” I said with confidence. I knew this was what was going to happen. “I forbid you.” He said. A thought occurred to me. “Sam is eighteen, you can’t tell him what to do anymore.” I said. He snorted. “Wake up you,” I said shaking Sam’s shoulder. //Have you already become a man in the village? If you have you can call a meeting of the elders and they can decide what should happen. They should have no issue with a shaman being bound to a protector, and one that is extraordinarily connected to spirit.// I said to him. His eyes snapped open and he grinned at me. He almost said our plan out loud but I silenced him with a ‘wait a minute’ finger. He looked at me skeptically. I got up and ran out of the hut. I wasn’t as familiar with this area of the village but I let my connection lead me to Rya. When I got to her she was in bed. I shook her awake. Her eyes were bloodshot and startled. “How did you fight the demon before?” I demanded from her. “With the elements of course!” She yelled at me. “Did you use spirit?” I asked her. “No, neither me or Qwen are good with spirit.” She answered. “It’s a spiritual being. We need to defeat it in the spirit realm!” I nearly yelled at her. I ran out and found Sam trying to find me. I threw my arms around him and kissed him. A big wooden stick hit me headfirst. I heard the smack of skin hitting skin hard. I heard a crunch. I looked over and saw Sam coming toward me and his father on the ground clutching his nose. “I know how to defeat the demon.” I said to him calmly. “Get Rya.” I whispered as I blacked out. I felt the buzz of the elements healing me before I could open my eyes. When I could open my eyes I saw Rya bending over me and I saw Sam holding my head up for her inspection. “I’m healed.” I told her. She smiled and nodded. I sat up and saw Sam’s dad still clutching his nose. Sam looked at him with pure hatred. I held onto the hope that we’d all stop fighting eventually. Sam carried me back to our hut. I let him grab some clothes from under the earth. I grabbed my own clothes and started getting dressed. I only had on a tank top and skinny jeans when his father came in and looked at me with pure hatred. I didn’t care. I grabbed a shirt and as I pulled it on I saw him try to hit me. I dodged easily. I pulled the rest of my shirt on and ran out of the hut. He followed me. I ran, and he was just as fast as I was. I jumped and grabbed a branch and stood there. He grabbed the same branch and took a swing at me. I jumped up to the next branch and he kept following me up the tree. I swung to another tree and let my connection to the earth lead my higher and higher. He followed me up to the top of the tree. “You can’t win this fight.” I said to him. “I’m constantly surrounded by what makes me stronger.” I said to him. He took a swing at me. I dove off of the tree and told the earth to swallow me. It took me back to the hut. “Did he try to attack you again?” Sam asked me. “Yeah.” I said to him. We went out to the car and we drove back to my pond. It felt surreal being there again, but it was good. Sam held me and I cried. We both cried. He held me for a long time. I don’t know when they got there, but Isaiah and Jenny were there, Rya and Qwen, Maggie and her husband were there, and so was my grandma. We were all huddled in this corner of the earth and they comforted us as we cried. They didn’t know the pain we were facing but they could see some of it and it hurt them to see it. We cried together for a long time. When we cried ourselves out, they all hugged us. Sam sat there with his head hanging low. I explained what had happened, how we were bound together. They looked at us with sadness and pity. Being bound to him actually made me happy though. They didn’t see my happiness though. They saw what they thought would be a hardship. “Can we call a tribunal about us being aloud to be together?” I asked them all. Their eyes got wide. “You want to involve the entire village in this?” Maggied said. “Wait a minute.” I said and climbed out of Sam’s lap. I dove into the water. I sank to the bottom with my air bubble. I focused on my spirit and came out of my body. My body kept itself safe by instinct. I flew all the way to the village and found Sam’s dad. There was a string of power controling him. I followed the power. I followed it for a long ways, and about five miles away I found the demon. It wasn’t as physical as I thought it would be. I flew back to the village and cut the binding. Once the binding was cut the shaman fell to the ground. I came back into my body and came back up. Once I resufaced they stared at me. “The demon is here.” I said to them. Their eyes got wide and they looked fearful. “The demon was controling your father. That’s why he was acting the way he was.” I said to Sam. “I cut the binding.” I said to him and his eyes relaxed a bit. “We need to go back now.” I said to him. We got into the car and went home. This was my home. When we got there I ran to the elders hut. I stuck my hand in the ground. None of them were present, thank God. I called Rya’s grandmothers bones to me. They peirced my skin. Memories flooded over me and I let them. Plans on how to destroy the upcoming threat. She knew it was a spiritual being. She was going to tell Rya, but she died before she got the chance. The demon killed her in her sleep. I knew how to kill this demon. Forever. When I came out I realized that the die had probably come out by now. I laughed. I went to the showers and when I was done I looked in the mirror. There was a silver streak in my hair. I looked on the underside of my hair. They hadn’t died it that far in. But it went all the way. It was natural. I got my clothes back on and I went ot find Rya. She was with Sam and his father. His father was telling of how the demon had controlled him all day. He didn’t have a choice in how he acted. I nodded. He knew who I was and he stood and hugged me. I hugged him back. “Are you better now that the demon is done controlling you?” I asked him. “How do you believe me so easily?” He asked me. “I had to cut the demon’s hold on you. I don’t know how I knew how to cut it, but I did. It was hard, but I managed it.” I said. His eyes bulged. “I couldn’t even cut that kind of binding.” He said. “And I have all the knowledge and power of the shaman.” He said. “But I have a stronger connection to spirit. I understand that world better than you ever will. I can access that world by will.” I answered. He nodded. “You both have my blessing.” He said looking at Sam and I. I smiled hugely. Sam came over and put his arm around my shoulders. I turned and kissed him. The feeling was amazing and beautiful. He held me and I could feel our love getting deeper. We went to lunch and ate in peace. Half of the village was staring at us. They all knew that we’d tied the knot. I looked into his eyes and there was a love so deep in them that I wanted to cry. There was no way that this really could be mine forever. He kissed my forehead and my heart spluttered nervously. We ate in outward silence. //So, I need to tell you something.// I told him. //Rya’s grandmother was buried under the council’s hut and I cut myself on one of her bones when I first got here, and that’s how I learned how to heal. I went back and called her bones to me. I told the earth to make them pierce me and I found out how she died. And how to defeat this demon; forever.// I told him. His eyes got wide and he read through my thoughts to find out what the plan was. He nodded and contemplated this. Then something clicked in my mind. He’d been in my thoughts, read my mind; we had the exact same connection that Rya and I had. I almost chocked. I swallowed and thought to him, //we’re reading each others’ thoughts. The same way Rya and I can do.// He nodded. “Didn’t you know that would happen when we tied the knot?” He asked me. I shook my head. Somebody cleared their throat. I turned to see who was looking for my attention. It was my mom. “You came and got clothes. Without coming to see me again.” She said. I patted the bench next to me. She sat down. “I wasn’t supposed to be out of the village. But I want you to bring the rest of the family here too. It doesn’t feel whole without the entire family here.” I told her. She nodded. She went and got food. She sat next to me and ate. “Looks like you still know your way around.” I said. She nodded and ate. She smiled. “This was my home up until about twenty years ago. That’s when I met your father outside the village. The village didn’t like him. I guess they were right about him.” She said. He’d left us and now she was a single mom with four kids. She smiled faintly at the memory. Once she finished her meal she left. “How are we going to explain this to her?” I asked him threading my fingers through his. He smiled sadly and shook his head. He got up and I followed him. We cleaned our plates and we headed back to our hut. He lay down on the mat and I joined him. He held me close and kissed my forehead. I explained about Rya’s grandmother more and he asked what it was like to live in that time period. I talked for a long time. I got thirsty and called some water to me. Sam sat up and drank some too, and grinned. I snuggled into him and fell asleep. We woke up to hungry stomachs. We got up and straightened out our clothes. When we went to the dining area, my mom found us. “Where have you been?” She demanded from me. “Discussing strategies,” I answered in a bored voice. My brothers were staring at me with wide eyes. I grinned. //Race you,// I challenged Sam. He grinned and took off. I sped after him and tackled him to the ground in front of the food court, or whatever you’d call it. Well, it was more of a buffet line but either way I tackled him in front of it. We rolled around for a minute and then I pinned him. He rolled and I fell off of him. He grinned and kissed me before helping me up. We got our food, completing each others’ movement again and sat in our usual place. I snuggled into his side and he put an arm around me. He kissed my forehead and started eating. I started eating but my mom was just staring at me. “What?” I asked her. “It’s like you’re glued to him. There is something seriously wrong with that.” She said. I rolled my eyes. Sam’s parents sat next to my mom and they started talking like old friends. They remembered her and she remembered them. My brothers just looked plain awkward. //Let’s show them to the guys’ table.// I said to Sam. He didn’t get what I was talking about at first but I nodded toward my older brothers and he grinned. “Come on guys,” I said to them. They followed me without being told twice. I introduced them at the guys’ table and they were greeted with open arms. When I thought nobody was looking I kissed Sam but a lot of hoots broke out. I blushed and tried to scamper away but Sam grabbed my wrist and pulled me back. I glared at him but he stared me down. I gave up quickly because I was getting used to being handled just a little bit. I snuggled into his side and the guys hooted again. I sat with them when Sam pulled me down and they all made room. I stayed glued to his side the entire time. We talked and joked with them like anybody else would. “So, how’s having to follow him around all day treating you?” One of the guys asked. My brothers immediately glared at Sam. I glared back at them and they caught my glare and backed down. Sam’s hand came down on my shoulder and he whispered in my ear, “You’re scaring all of us with the red eyes thing.” I grinned at him and the atmosphere loosened. “Not as bad as I thought it would be. I don’t mind being linked to him. Though it seems like we have an extra mother hanging around lately. Rya can be such a mother hen.” I said grinning. My brothers’ eyes got really wide. I rolled my eyes. “You’re linked to him? As in you followed him into his sleeping courters?” My mom’s incredibly dangerous voice creaped up from behind me; I slowly turned around. “I was looking to talk to him about something. I didn’t know what I was doing.” I told her. “You could have asked for a pardon.” She said. I squared my shoulders. “But I didn’t so that’s that. I made my choice and I’m fine with the consequences.” I told her. “You do realize that’s the equivalent of an engagement?” She asked me. I nodded and got up. //You were supposed to let me get up first and I was about to anyway.// Sam said to me. //Well then stand up now. You’ll look a little more caring for how I feel.// I said back to him. He got up and followed me when I walked away. She followed us. “I’m not letting you do this to your life.” She said. “There’s the key word; my life. This is my life and I will live it the way I want to. I’ve made my choice and I’m following through with it.” I said to her. “Why are you acting like this? It’s like you’re bound by more than the traditional mistake of following a guy into the guy’s dormitory. It’s like you’re actually bound to him.” She said and a dawning realization came into her eyes. “Have you ever been to the spirit realm?” She asked me. “Many times; I know that realm as well as this one.” I told her. “Did you ever see a sash around your waist?” She asked me. “Yes; he had the exact same one. Mom, we love each other.” Her eyes got wider. “What color were the sashes?” She asked me. “Right now?” I asked her. “Could you find out right now?” She asked me. I led them to our hut. She recognized my stuff and huffed. I sat on the mat. I directed them to sit in a circle holding hands with me. They did. I took both hands. “I’m going to take you there with me.” I said to her. She nodded and closed her eyes. I focused on my spirit. We were in the spirit realm and she saw us. She looked at us and her eyes almost bugged out of her head. “That’s…incomprehensible.” She said. “We tied the knot mom. I love him and I want to be with him forever.” I told her. She nodded. She came over and touched my sash. I could see her feel every emotion that came with love, but in its purest form. Each singular and each different, she felt each emotion that Sam and I had shared and when she let go she looked at us with a new glimmer in her eyes. She nodded content with our proof. She went over to Sam and touched his sash and I could see the same emotions cross her face in the exact same order. She let go much sooner than she had with me. “Take me back now. I believe you and you have my blessings.” She said to Sam and me. I grabbed her hand and Sam’s hand and brought us back to our bodies. She got up and left. I watched her go so I didn’t see Sam come at me. He kissed me with a force that had my vision clouded and my mind muddled by the time he broke away. I gasped for breath and when I caught it I got up. I needed to run, to jump, and to sing my joy. He let me go and I ran faster than the wind, jumped high, flipped, spiraled and everything else you could imagine letting all my energy out. When I was ready, I went and showered. I admired my new silver streak and washed it with a gentle care. I took a long time in the shower, letting the water wash away the bad parts of the day and lingering on the good. I was pruning and wrinkled when I got out of the shower and I padded over to the mirror. I looked older and wiser now; you could tell I’d suffered a lot of pain and that I’d lived through it. I looked more strongly built, ready to face the world and like I’d gotten five years older. I got dressed and looked again. I looked young, but wise, knowing how to live through my worst fears and come out stronger. I came out of the showers and as I was heading toward the hut, my mom stopped me. She looked at me, really looked at me and nodded. “What?” I asked her. “You finally look like a full grown woman and not a sheltered little kid. You’ll need to be able to look like a woman to get married to him, if that’s what you’re planning.” She said looking proud. I smiled at her and hugged her. “And now you get to explain all of this to your brothers.” She said to me. “Uh…Can’t you do that?” I asked her pleadingly. “You made your bed, now you have to lay in it.” She told me. I kept walking to the hut. Sam was already in his pajamas and he had a book. He had found a lamp or lantern, I wasn’t sure which it was and he was reading. He looked up when I came in and he kissed me as I sat down. As I got situated he deepened the kiss and my mom cleared her throat. I broke away and he looked disappointed. “Um…my mom wants us to explain what we did to my brothers.” I told him without any preamble. He froze and stared at me. He looked utterly afraid. “If either of them tried to hurt you I will kick their butt.” I offered trying to get him to do this with me. My eyes begged him and he nodded. He grabbed some jeans and went into the other room. “How am I supposed to present this to them now?” I asked her incredulously. “I don’t know, why did you think I would make you put up with anything more if I knew how.” She answered me. I rolled my eyes and Sam came back out of the other room. He didn’t have a shirt on but that didn’t bother me. My mom stared at him and at me. “What?” I asked her. She just shook her head. We walked over to the guy’s hut. When I saw it I thought to Sam //so they’re in that hut I guess.// He thought back to me. //It’s actually called a dormitory.// Oh. I totally knew that. He grinned at me. I grimaced and he focused at the task at hand. Then I stopped. I didn’t have to do this. I turned tail and ran smack into Maggie. She grabbed me by the ear. My mom had Sam by the ear already. They dragged us in by the most embarrassing means possible. I grabbed Sam’s hand and focused on my spirit. We both came into the spirit realm. Maggie glared at my body and I laughed. Sam laughed too. He came over and kissed me. Kissing in the spirit realm was a complicated thing. I couldn’t get overwhelmed or we’d end up in our bodies. He deepened the kiss and I lost my control. We were slammed back into our bodies. I gasped for a couple of moments and I felt a broken rib all of a sudden. They were trying to wake us up. I rolled over and launched myself over Sam and Maggie used the earth to grab me. I called the elements to me and told them to heal me. I cried out in pain as I landed on the bad rib, and was dragged on it. I used a lot of willpower and flipped over so I wasn’t getting pulled on the rib that was trying to heal. “Go on,” she prodded me in the direction of my brothers. Half of the guys there were cracking up. I faced them and tried to get up. And screamed. Sam caught me and held me so gently I didn’t hurt anywhere. He held me for about two minutes as my bones and the organs that bones had started puncturing healed. Then he cringed. He had a headache. I could feel his pain and I called the elements and told them to heal him. He relaxed as it stopped hurting. //I’m gonna spirit us out of this.// I told him. He suppressed a grin. Then earth grabbed his feet and dragged him over to my brothers. They just stared at me. //Rya! I don’t know how to explain all of this to my brothers! Help me!// I yelled into her mind. We clamped our mouths shut and I snuggled into him when Maggie started looking pissed. Sam had to put me down so we could be more comfortable. Rya showed up after a couple of minutes. I sighed in relief. My brothers recognized her and grinned. She grinned back. “So, July and Sam got linked because she followed him in here when she wanted to talk to him.” She started. They grinned. They already knew what this meant. “How much do you two know?” I asked them. “We know that if you follow a dude into a dormitory that you have to sleep in the same room as him till you can’t put up with him anymore. And that you two probably didn’t mind it much.” My oldest brother said. I glared at him. “We didn’t mind it once we got used to each other. We fell in love.” I said and my eyes wandered to Sam’s and his were so tender that I almost drowned in them. When I swayed on the spot he caught me and we sat down. My brothers watched us with eyes bugging out of their heads. A sudden chill ran through my body. Everything got really cold and my head hit Sam’s lap with my eyes already closed. He looked at me and held my head trying to figure out what was happening and then everything went black. I woke up with Rya and Sam and my mom hovering over me in my hut. I looked up and made sure nobody else was there. I took my shirt off and unclipped my bra. I saw the leech and almost screamed. Sam got it off of me and Rya healed my skin. Then I realized that Sam was seeing me half naked and I covered myself. He blushed at the same time I did and he left the hut. Rya rolled her eyes. I grabbed a fresh bra and one of Rya’s dresses. I found a pair of leggings and Rya looked me over for more leeches and anything else that would bother me. She found a lot of big scratches and healed them for me. Once I was in good condition I came out of the hut. I called water to me and took a drink. I headed back to the dormitory and when I found Sam I hugged him. “Are you better then?” He asked me. “Yes, much better without the leech on my pressure point system.” I told him and grinned. He hugged me and we just stood there like that for a while. “Are you two just going to stand there or tell us what happened?” My second oldest brother said. I sighed and went over to them again. Sam sat down and pulled me down with him. He pulled me into his lap and held me. I sighed. “Do you know anything about the spirit realm?” I asked them. “I think grandma mentioned it.” My oldest brother said. “Tell me what you remember.” I said. He said he remembered that it was where everything was shown about the spirit. If you were in love, how deep you were in love and it showed what your spirit was closest to with an animal guide. “Well, a sash around your waist shows you’re in love, and if you’re connected closely and if you love each other enough you can tie the sashes together. It binds you together for life more securely than marriage.” I took a deep breath. “Sam and I tied our sashes together.” I told them. It was dead quiet in the room. What had been a rumor was now verified as truth. They stared at Sam and me with shocked expressions. “But, you’re so young!” One of them said to me. “I’m so much older in mind than in body. I know I want to spend the rest of my life with him. And I’m going to spend the rest of my life with him. We can’t separate now and we can’t take it back. We’ll probably get married soon. I don’t know. I have to deal with this demon first.” I told them. I got up and walked out. Sam caught up with me quickly. “July, can I ask you something?” He asked me. “You just asked me something and I didn’t object.” I responded, turning to face him. He got down on one knee and asked me, “If we live through this, will you marry me? You don’t have to do it right away, but I want to marry you. Maybe after you finish college but-” He babbled on. I put my hand on his mouth. “Yes.” I answered. He hugged me hard then. We went back to the hut. He went into the other room to get dressed again and I had to find some new underwear. I took off my bra and tried to find a new one. I found a sports bra and slipped it on. I took off my pants and underwear and searched for some clean ones. I still didn’t have any underwear on when he walked into the room and he blushed. I didn’t bother to cover myself and he just climbed into bed and rolled onto his side. I searched for about half an hour and still couldn’t find anything clean. I found my silk pajama bottoms and threw them on anyway. It was so hot and humid. I climbed into bed and when Sam rolled over he kissed me with a passion that led into a great end to a lot of crap of a day. I woke up sore and snuggled closer to him. The brisk morning air caressed me in ways that chilled me to the bone. He sat up and rubbed his eyes and I felt my whole world focused on him. He grinned and kissed me good morning. I worried about my morning breath but realized he had it too so it didn’t really matter. I sat up and felt the chill of the morning on my arms. I shivered and hunkered back down into the blankets. Sam pulled me close and we fell back asleep. When we woke up again, Rya was in the room. “Are you two gonna get up for breakfast?” She asked us with a grin. I blushed and tried to grab something without getting out of bed. Rya rolled her eyes and kicked my bag closer to me. I grabbed some skinny jeans and pulled them on. Then, just to spite her I grabbed the lowest v-neck shirt that was in my bag without a tank top and pulled it on. I brushed out my hair and by this time, Sam was dressed. He kissed my neck and grabbed my brush. He fixed his hair so it wasn’t puffed up and gave it back. I rolled my eyes and he laughed. When we left the hut we were inseparable. My mom just grinned and my brothers just rolled their eyes and Rya grinned like she had some big secret. I stared her down and her grin faded. //If you tell anybody I’ll get you. I don’t know how yet but I can come up with something.// I promised her. She left and said to me, “I’m not gonna tell the whole village, Qwen and Isaiah are the only ones who know and you just can’t avoid that.” She shrugged. I blushed and looked at Isaiah and he grinned at me. “I gotta go talk to Isaiah,” I said to Sam. He nodded. I got up and went over to Isaiah. His grin got wider. “If you say anything, you are so screwed.” I threatened him. “I’ve got more than half the village that likes me and I have all the strong people as friends. You can’t do anything.” He said with a challenging grin. //Elements hold me up as I enter the spirit realm.// I told the elements. I focused on my spirit and when I saw my body get tattoos on my chest all of a sudden I was shocked back into my body. “Wow, looks like I’m kickin’ butt…” I said to myself. “Okay, let’s try that again.” I said to myself. I focused on my spirit again. I watched as my tattoos glowed and everybody stared. I saw a sash around Isaiah’s waist that was as red as mine, but it was more blue-ish. I went and found Jenny. She had the same sash on. I grinned and came back into my body. “You better boy, ‘cause I can get all kinds of dirt on you too.” I said to him. His eyes got really wide. “What do you know?” He asked me looking more like my old brother. I jerked my chin toward the huts to our left. Then I changed my mind. “Actually, I haven’t climbed any trees yet today and not getting to climb is the bane of my existence, well besides not being with Sam, so let’s go.” I said. He grinned and stood. He started running toward the forest. I ran and caught up with him faster than he expected. His eyes got really wide and he pushed himself faster. I did the same and he was shocked. I jumped into the first tree that I could reach. We both climbed higher and higher. We got to the highest branch that could support two and we sat for a moment. “You’re in love with her. It’s so based on friendship and you two love each other with everything in you. With Sam and I it’s based off comrade and working together on everything and not one having power over the other.” I told him. He nodded. “I didn’t understand the want to be with her so often and the want to protect her so much before but that makes sense. I didn’t realize I was in…” He let his words fade. I nodded. “I had the same issue. I didn’t know I was in love and it was hard to say or admit at first; even to Rya.” I told him. He hung his head. “I won’t tell her before you do if you don’t go blab to the village.” He grinned and nudged me with his elbow. “Not even my buddies?” He asked me teasingly. I gave him a ‘be serious’ look. He sobered up and nodded. “I won’t tell anybody. You don’t tell anybody.” He nodded and we shook on it. “What happened when you got those extra tattoos? Why did they start glowing?” He asked me. I thought back through all of my memories, the memories of a hundred lifetimes and those of this lifetime. “I became the first female shaman of this tribe.” I told him. His eyes got really wide. “Show me,” He asked me and I took his hand. I focused on my spirit and we were in the spirit realm. He saw me and my sash. He gasped. I went to the showers and looked at myself. I had tattoos across my body and on my hands. My sash was now getting to be rose red. We were so connected. He saw our sashes connected and the patterns on them and he just stared. “Look at yours,” I told him. He looked at himself and he saw his sash. It was beautiful. He went and found Jenny and she had the same one. He touched hers and I saw his feel every emotion they’d shared. Most of it was good. But they weren’t ready to tie them together. “It’s time to go back,” I told him after a couple of minutes. He nodded and took my hand. We came back to our bodies and we climbed down. We raced back to the eating area. He found Jenny with her friends. He scooted in next to her and she grinned hugely. I grinned at her and I could see she knew I was hiding something. I walked away and she followed me. “What’s up?” She asked me. “Go talk to Isaiah.” I said. She looked so frustrated. She turned around and I had a thought. //Isaiah, can I tell Sam? If he promises not to tell?// I asked him. He thought for a moment. //Thanks. Now she’s harassing me to tell her what’s going on. Um… I don’t care. He’ll probably pick it out of your head eventually.// He said. I laughed out loud. Sam was up and he picked me up. “Hey!” I protested. He brought me over to the table Isaiah was at. “What did you do?” He asked him. “Huh? I didn’t do anything.” Isaiah said avoiding Jenny’s consistent battering. I started laughing so hard I cried. I climbed down and he held me there. I rolled my eyes and snuggled into him. Jenny just stared at us. “Is it about you then?” She asked me and started pounding me with questions. After the third question in ten seconds my head started spinning. //Air, make a soundproof barrier.// I told the element. When all the sound left our ears Sam laughed. I laughed with him. Rya walked into my bubble. “That’s not very polite.” She told me. I rolled my eyes. She flicked her hand and sound came back to my ears in a torrent that knocked me onto my butt. She laughed at me. I stuck out my tongue at her. Sam picked me up and set me next to Isaiah and he scooted in on my other side. He put his arm around my shoulders and I snuggled into him. Jenny was still bombarding me with questions. “Have you noticed that I’m not answering your questions yet? I’m not going to because it’s not about me.” I said and she went back to Isaiah. He glared at me. “It’s your life, why shouldn’t it be challenging. Mine has been crap enough lately.” I said to him. “Except for very recently you mean?” He said. I glared at him. He laughed and eyed Sam. Sam blushed and I had earth launch a rock at Isaiah’s head. I hit him dead center in the back of the head. “Ow!” He complained. Jenny grinned but I could tell she was wishing she had a rock to hit over the head with. “So what’s been going on with you two lately?” She asked us. “Did you two actually tie the knot?” She asked me. I nodded and dodged a rock that was sailing toward my head. It smacked Sam in the nose and his nose started bleeding. “Aww, you’re kidding right?” He said glaring at Isaiah who was shrinking in his seat. I called the elements and healed him and washed the blood off of his face and shirt. And the bit that got in my hair. Jenny stared at us in dismay. “But you can’t do that without a shaman or the chief gives you permission.” She said confused. “We’re both shaman in our own rights so it was possible.” I said. Sam shook his head. “You’re not a shaman, you’re a protector.” “I’m a shaman.” I told him. “Do you have a bunch of tattoos on your body in the spirit realm?” He asked me skeptically. I was picking food off of Isaiah’s plate as I nodded. Isaiah, Jenny and half of the table choked. “What?” He asked me. “Yes I’m covered in tattoos in the spirit realm too.” I told him. “Show me.” He demanded. “And me, I can get my dad to recognize you,” Jenny said. I grabbed her hand and kept my arm on Isaiah’s back and focused on my spirit. I brought all three of them to the spirit realm. When Sam and Jenny saw me they gawked. “Sam, look at you.” I told him smiling. He did and he had all the same tattoos as me. He hugged me hard and I saw Jenny staring. “What animal is Isaiah, Jenny? Neither of us can decide and it’s messing with us.” I said to her. His form was almost shapeless. I thought he was a bear or a turtle and Sam thought he was some kind of fish. “A turtle definitely.” She said right away. Then she really saw him. She looked down and saw her sash and just stared at him. “I was going to tell you when we left the table.” He told her. She smiled and hugged him tight. I led Sam over and put a hand on each of them. I brought us back to our bodies and Jenny cried on Isaiah’s shoulder. He stood and brought him to her hut and they sat there for a long time. He’d had Sam and I follow them. We sat there and held them as they cried together. It was past dinner time when a man came into the hut without so much as knocking. “What’s happened?” He said to her as Isaiah held her and she cried. He looked ready to kill Isaiah. When he lurched at him I had air catch him before he could attack my brother. “Nothing is wrong, she’s just accepting something that’s happened that she didn’t really see coming.” I said to him. He looked at me and nodded. He knew who I was and knew I was a strong person and wise for my years. He saw the tattoos on my chest and frowned. “When did those show up?” He asked me. “Today, when I was arguing with Isaiah, they showed up.” I said grinning and admiring my new tattoos. He nodded. “Why is she crying?” He asked me. I shot a questioning look at Isaiah. Jenny looked up and noticed her father and crawled into Isaiah’s lap as he was looking at me. He whispered in her ear and she stopped crying immediately. She put on a strong face and wiped the last of her tears on Isaiah’s shirt. She cleared her throat and her father looked at her. “These two are ready to be recognized as shaman.” She said. He appraised Isaiah and Sam. “No, not Isaiah, just July and Sam.” She said. His eyes got wider and he laughed. “A woman can’t be a shaman.” He said. “Why not? A woman can be a protector and I have a better connection than most shamans ever will with the spirit realm.” I said. “Because women can’t get into the spirit realm without help.” He answered soothingly. I rolled my eyes. I got away from everybody there and took the chiefs hand. I focused on my spirit and we were in the spirit realm. “Who’s helping me?” I asked him. His eyes got wide and I remembered that I’d tied the knot with Sam. “I have all the right tattoos. I’ve been able to access this place since I was chosen.” I told him. “Who gave you permission?” He asked me ignoring what I’d said. “Nobody; I’d left my body and brought Sam with me and he asked if I wanted to. I did so we did. We didn’t need permission because we were both shaman and people of power within the village anyway.” I told him. His eyes bugged out. “It takes two shaman’s permission to do that and you couldn’t be lying. If you lie to your chief in the spirit realm the air around you gets tainted.” He said. I nodded. He saw my tattoos then and nodded. I took his hand again and brought us back to our bodies. “Do you believe me now?” I asked him. He nodded. “Women have all the same strengths as men do spiritually. We should have the same rights to shaman…hood as men do.” I said to him. He nodded. He was in shock. I rolled my eyes. “You need to discuss this with the elders.” He nodded. He left the hut. Jenny started crying again. “I’ll bring you two some food.” I said. I got up and Sam followed me. We went to the dining area and got food enough for four. We brought it back with a lot of looks from the other people. Jenny stopped crying and ate and then she lay down and slept. Isaiah did the same thing and lay next to her. He pulled her close to him and she held him. I smiled and grabbed the plates and Sam and I snuck out. We cleaned the plates with a lot of curious glances. We sat down next to Rya and Qwen. “We’re shaman.” I told her as soon as we sat down. I didn’t notice the people she was talking to until I’d already said it. She was talking to the current shamans. Her eyes got really wide and I showed her my new tattoos and Sam took off his shirt to show the same tattoos. Her eyes almost popped out of her head. “We have to go tell the chief.” She said getting up before Qwen. I stared her down and she sat again. “We already told the chief. He’s in a state of shock.” I said to her. She nodded. She knew me well enough to guess how I’d shown him the spirit world without thinking about him seeing our knot. I grinned at her. She rolled her eyes. I walked back to the hut and looked for some decent pajamas and I couldn’t find any of my clothes again. I walked back and found her. “Give me my clothes.” I told her. “I don’t have them.” She said. She wasn’t bluffing either. Of course all of Sam’s clothes were still there. I went out to the car and grabbed the pair of booty shorts that always lived in Isaiah’s trunk as a joke. I walked back to the hut and put them and without a shirt on and looked through Sam’s stuff for a long shirt. I found one and grabbed it as he walked back into the room. I looked up at him and he just shook his head. I threw his shirt on and crawled into bed. The next morning I woke up to Isaiah and Jenny coming into our hut. I’d taken my shirt off when I got really hot because sharing a bed always got too hot for me and I pulled the covers up around my shoulders. Jenny took one look at me and the shirt beside the bed and grinned. I rolled my eyes and Sam pulled me closer at the burst of cold. I scooted over to him and he kept sleeping restfully. “We just needed to get out of our hut before my dad saw us and we didn’t have anywhere else to go and we wanted to stay together. You don’t mind, do you?” Jenny whispered to me. I shook my head no and she sighed in relief. “Go grab a mat and you can sleep in here for right now. But you will have to tell your dad soon.” I told her. She nodded and sent Isaiah to grab a mat. We sat in an awkward silence for a moment and then I snuggled into Sam some more and fell back asleep. I woke up again to Rya trying to get to me without waking anybody else up. I grinned and grabbed my phone from my bag, which had mysteriously reappeared. It was eleven in the morning. I sat up and said loudly, “Alright everybody, time to get up.” I heard a lot of grumbling from Isaiah and Jenny as they rolled over in harmony and pulled each other closer for warmth against the cold that Rya had let in. I rolled my eyes and Rya took a flying leap to the side of my mattress that wasn’t occupied because Isaiah and Jenny had parked their mat in front of the door. She landed cleanly, jarring Sam awake. He sat up fast and had to grab the blanket to cover him from the cold. I laughed at her and she grinned at me. “So, the chief wants to announce you two to the village as shaman at dinner, and he needs you two to show up before the council right after lunch which is in an hour. If I can smell either of you I will kill you.” She said. “And I can definitely smell both of you right now.” She grinned at us. I rolled my eyes and snuggled into Sam. He grabbed some pants from his bag without getting up and slid them on under the blanket and left me lying there. “Can you pass me my bag?” I asked her. “You’re completely able bodied. Get up and get it.” She said to me. I glared at her and pushed her off of my bed. She rolled willingly enough but she kept the bag just out of my reach. I glared at her and grabbed one of Sam’s shirts and put it on. It was long enough so that I could grab my bag without too much difficulty. Jenny and Isaiah were watching me with amused expressions. I pawed through my bag and then realized that I needed something traditional to the tribe. “You’re going to have to give me something traditional.” I said to Rya who nodded. I threw on some quick clothes. In the other room and when I came out Isaiah was dragging the mat toward the room. It figured. They’d get situated in there and sleep till three. I walked to the shower and got myself cleaned up. I went to Rya’s hut and she threw me some seriously fancy traditional clothes. I put them on and put on some slight makeup to cover up a couple red spots. I brushed my hair the way Rya did and Rya put on a less dressy outfit. I went to lunch and found Sam. We grabbed plates for four and went back to our hut. The smell of food had Isaiah yawning and rolling out of bed. We gave them their food and Jenny thanked me thinking I was Rya and told Rya thanks. I smiled and told her it was July. She did a double take and lay back on the mat. “That’s just scary. Isaiah, she looks freakishly like Rya.” She said to him. He just nodded. Jenny braided my silver strand and it made me look older and so much more mature. “Now, most of the elders haven’t seen you since the first time you came here. You’ve gotten like ten times more mature and just plain older. Don’t be surprised if they think you’re Rya for a long time. I mean, you even sound like Rya now that you’ve matured.” I nodded in thanks for Jenny’s advice. Sam and I left the room and he kissed me. He deepened the kiss so that I was left breathless. My mind was getting more and more muddled and he kissed me in a soul deep way so that I was left gasping. I locked my arms around him and kissed him with everything in me. Somebody cleared their throat and I ignored it. They cleared their throat louder and I frowned though I didn’t break the kiss. “Enough you two!” Sam’s mom yelled at us. I broke away instantly blushing. Sam was gasping for breath as much as I was. She rolled her eyes and looked at him with questioning eyes. “Did you really tie the knot?” She asked him. He nodded and her eyes got really wide. “I guess you’re pretty much a part of the family then.” She said, hugging me reluctantly. I hugged her and looked at Sam. She must have seen our emotions sparkling behind our eyes because she looked proud when she left. Jenny and Isaiah came out of their room, brushed and clothed and they each grabbed one of us and dragged us to Rya’s hut. She took one look at me and almost fell over. “Come on.” I said to her. I unbraided the braid and re-braided it in a way that was more comfortable to me as we walked to the elder’s hut. Rya watched me the whole way, Qwen at her side holding her hand. Sam held her hand all of a sudden and he grabbed mine and nodded toward Isaiah. “Jenny, get behind all of us. They won’t know which is which.” I said to her. She rolled her eyes but did it anyway. We walked in and their eyes went to Rya and Qwen. “So, you think you’re a shaman July?” The most outspoken one said to Rya. “You still aren’t comfortable in our formal wear are you?” He spat at her. “I’m Rya you fool!” She yelled at him, the elements swirling around her. I broke rank and placed a hand on her shoulder, sending water and spirit to her to calm her. She calmed down quickly. They all turned their eyes on me. I stepped forward dragging Sam with me. “You can’t even handle letting someone else lead something as simple as stepping forward! How do you expect to learn the ways of the shaman?” Another one of the elders said. “Be silent!” I commanded them and spirit filled my words with power and strength. They were all silent and they stared at me. “I am a shaman because I am connected to the spirit realm in ways that a normal villager couldn’t imagine. I am a shaman because I am more connected to the spirit realm than a mere protector could ever be. The position has chosen me, not the other way around. I honestly don’t need a bunch of people asking me about their spiritual health, but I’m going to be able to answer them with more confidence and more truth than any other shaman.” I told them. They stayed silent. “If you have questions, why don’t you raise your hand or something so I don’t have to deal with all of you at once? I already have a headache.” I said. One of the elders raised their hand. It was a woman and she seemed patient though disapproving. I turned my attention to her. “Why should we believe you about any of this?” She asked me. “I can show you all of this, but it would be a serious pain to do. Rya has seen it; Isaiah and Jenny have seen it. Your chief has seen it.” I said. “Do you doubt your chief?” I asked them. “What kind of spell have you put on him?” The outspoken one said pointing an accusing finger at me. “Do you want to see the spirit realm? I can show it to you. It’s a pain in the butt to get everybody back though. Nobody ever wants to leave.” I told them. “I believe her; I’ve seen her do it.” Maggie said confidently and staring down anybody who glared at her. Suddenly my knees were weak and everything was spinning around me. I fell into Sam and felt the demon trying to send me to the spirit realm. Through strength of will I stayed in my own body. “Then take me to the spirit realm.” The oldest of them asked me. My body didn’t want to obey my commands anymore. Instead of running up and striking like it wanted to, I fainted instead. // Make sure none of the elders are near me. The demon is trying to take control of my body, it wants to attack them. // I told Rya, Qwen, Isaiah and Sam. I heard a lot of “give her rooms” and a lot of shooing. Sam picked me up and took me away from there. He walked outside and screamed. I opened my eyes and saw the demon. It started pouring rain. This was just a bad rainy night.

I jumped out of Sam’s arms and told Isaiah that I’d be communicating through the link and he nodded. I flew high into the air and went to the spirit realm. I saw Isaiah fighting the demon and I hit the demon in the exact same points with the each element as it hit the demon in the real world I hit it in the spirit realm. It didn’t know how to deal with this. It attacked Isaiah with everything in it and I saw Isaiah knocked down. It was about to kill him when I threw everything I had at its’ belly. It didn’t like this. I searched through Rya’s grandmothers’ memories. // I saw an old print and I knew how to read it. // // It had an illustration of the demon and names to each part of the body. It had pressure points highlighted in red. It had each pressure point that would kill it highlighted in purple. “Child, why do you read these things? They will never get past the protectors. You are not a protector, thus you do not need to know this.” A man’s voice came from above me. I recognized this voice as uncle. I looked up. “What would happen if I did become a protector uncle? Or a shaman?” I asked him. “Women can’t do either of those, honey. Only men can get into the spirit realm by themselves and only the chief’s family can be protectors.” My uncle said. I looked away, knowing that I was a protector. I might have to fight these things. He took the book away and the last thing I saw was what I’d been looking for. To kill the demon you have to hit all of the purple spots at the same time. You had to attack each one with just the right elements and I now knew how to fight it. How to kill it. There were exactly five points and I could manage that. // I came back to the real world and stopped the demon from killing Isaiah. “Water, Earth, Air, Fire, and Spirit, come to me!” I commanded. I focused the elements in the right positions. Air stopped the demons nose from breathing. Earth grabbed the demons feet and pushed in at the knees. Fire pounded at the beasts’ heart. Water stopped the beast from breathing through it’s’ mouth and spirit blinded it and pushed in at its’ eyes, forcing them to stab into its’ brain and kill it. It fell to the ground with a loud bang, like a clap of thunder right next to me. All of the elders were staring at me in shock. I went up to the oldest of the elders and asked for a knife. He handed it to me, staring in shock. I took it and went up to the demon and told the elements to stop. It was dead and there was no need to destroy its’ body like that. I had earth roll it over and I got on top of the thing. It was as big as the elders hut, or as big as a normal McDonalds. I got above its’ heart and stabbed it with the knife. I used the elements for strength and gouged a hole a foot wide through its’ tough skin and when I got to the spiritual center of the being, two spirits rushed through it and went to Rya and Qwen. I saw them fill out some more and saw them get a little more substance to them and they collapsed into each other sobbing. I got off the demon and went to Isaiah. He was cut and bleeding really bad, with a few broken bones. I called the elements to me once more and told them to heal him. They healed him in about ten minutes. When Isaiah was healed I went and collapsed into Sam’s arms. He held me and stroked my hair murmuring reassurances into my ears. Just hearing his voice kept me content in my exhaustion. I hadn’t used all that much physical energy, but it had taken a lot of will power and a lot of mental strain to access one of Rya’s grandmothers’ memory alone and not get any other of them. My mind had been through enough strain and I’d gotten up two hours ago. I just slumped in his arms and he held me. Rya came and took me from him. “You made us human again!” She sobbed into my shoulder. “Can we still talk through our minds?” I asked her. She shook her head. “Can we make that possible?” I asked her. Her eyes lit up and she nodded. I saw my mom talking to my grandmother come around the side of the building and they both just about had a heart attack when they saw the demon. Qwen came up and held Rya and Sam carried me over to my grandma and my mom. I had the earth carry them into the elders’ tent and made them a couch to sit on together. I made myself a couch and Sam sat next to me and I sobbed into his shirt for a long time. He held me tightly and lovingly. He was gentle with me and he just held me. The elders just stared at me. I eventually stopped but Rya and Qwen were still sobbing. I shook my head and dried my face on Sam’s shirt. I realized that hadn’t messed up my hair, or even had a bead fall off of the dress I was wearing when I’d fought the demon. I laughed out loud and hiccupped. Sam picked me up and took me to our hut. I pulled off my dress and leggings and crawled into bed. He crawled in after me and I slept. I woke up when Rya burst into my room. She was dancing and looked almost drunk. I grabbed the beer from her hand and dumped it on the bare earth. I told the earth to suck it up and grabbed her hand. I focused on my spirit and took us both to the spirit world and she was sane in the spirit world. “NO DRINKING!” I told her and she nodded. “I only grabbed a couple, but my body isn’t used to spirits. I’m just so happy!” She said and flopped on the ground. I grabbed her hand and looked through all the memories I could and grabbed her now deep, deep pink sash and tying it around my head, and tying mine around hers. I brought us back to our bodies. //Can you hear me?// I asked her. She nodded and looked for more beer. I rolled my eyes and got up. She laughed and leered suggestively at my underwear. I threw on the dress and leggings again and Sam got up looking at her worriedly. I led her to her hut and pushed her in. When she fought back I easily overpowered her in her drunken state. She gave up with the first pop in the mouth. She looked hurt. I rolled my eyes and tucked her into the bed. I called spirit to me and told it to put her to sleep. She was out in seconds. I got up and ran smack into Sam. “Hi,” I said going around him. “What are we doing?” He asked me. “We’re finding Qwen who is more than likely to more drunk than her.” I told him. It was more likely that Qwen would know where the spirits were. I had to go through the entire village to find him drunkenly talking to the guys in the dormitory. They were laughing hard they were crying as drunken Qwen walked around running into stuff. I grabbed him and led him back to his hut and put him to bed the way I had with Rya. I put a wall of earth in front of their hut so that they would have to be sober to get out. I rolled my eyes at the fact that I had to do this and Sam kissed me. I smiled and broke away. Then Sam grabbed my hand and led me to the elders’ tent. When we were at the entrance I realized where we were. I have definitely had enough of the elders for one day. I didn’t need any more emotional or mental strain. I tried to pull away from him and he tightened his grip. The doors were already opened because Isaiah and Jenny were holding them open. Sam tugged a little harder and I lost an inch. “Please, don’t make me face them! Not today!” I begged him half insane. When he saw the wild look in my eyes he got worried. He held me but I struggled against him. I broke away and ran like a madman away from them. Sam and Isaiah followed. I pushed myself farther and harder. They couldn’t keep up and I jumped into a tree and climbed and climbed. I hid from them, blocking Sam from finding me through our mental link. I was in the top branch of one of the smallest trees, which was totally opposite of what I usually do. I hid there and didn’t come down till after dark. I snuck back and got a mat in the girls’ dormitory. I slept and heard a lot of murmuring around me. I woke up hungry and wishing for… I didn’t even know what I was wishing for. I went to the hut and without waking up Sam I grabbed my wallet and swimsuit. I spirited myself from there to a McDonalds and got a breakfast wrap and ate it. It was filling and it felt good against my empty stomach. I threw the garbage away and walked to my pond. I lay there in peace all day. I’d thrown on my swimsuit to tan so I had a nice and dark tan by the end of the day. I came back to the village to a lot of panic. They couldn’t figure out where Rya was and there was a boulder in front of her hut. I sighed and when I appeared in front of her hut there were a couple of screams. I moved the rock and went back into the hut. She was sleeping off her hangover with Qwen next to her. “Now stop spazzing,” I told them and put the boulder back up. “Why did you do that?” One of the elders asked me. “So they can’t get out until they’re sober.” I said. Realization dawned on his face and he nodded. I started to walk away and then Sam jumped out from behind a hut and grabbed me. I didn’t struggle and he took me to the elders’ hut. I still didn’t want to face them yet but I didn’t put up a fight. I knew I’d have to eventually. He sat me on the same couch I’d made before. I crawled into his lap and snuggled into him there, feeling like a little kid, sitting there. I honestly didn’t care. I was snuggling into Sam when Maggie spoke. “So, we only need you to prove to us that you have the makings of a shaman and we’ll announce you to the tribe. You’ve defeated the demon so that’s got most of us convinced, but some others are stubborn and don’t want a woman as a shaman.” She said looking at one man on her left. I got up and offered my hand. “I you don’t believe me, then take my hand, put a hand on my arm, I don’t care, as long as there’s physical contact. If you don’t want to visit the spirit realm then don’t touch me or anybody who is touching me.” I told them. They all touched me. I laughed, unsure if I could bring this many people. I took a deep breath and focused on my spirit. I couldn’t do it. My mind was too scattered. I called water and spirit to me and calmed myself. When I was calm I focused on my spirit again and I was in the spirit realm. They were all shocked and unsure what to do. The oldest of them looked at me and the first thing they saw was my sash. They were shocked at it and they asked who had given us permission. “Sam and I just did it. We didn’t ask anybody.” I said and they questioned me for a little bit, the same way that the chief did. When they were done I had them all get in the same positions as their physical bodies were in. I brought them all back and they were all amazed. “Make your decision. I’m going to bed.” I said to them. “Wait, maybe I’ll scrounge up some food first.” I said feeling my empty stomach. I started heading toward the food court. Apparently it was still dinner time so I just grabbed some food. Rya decided to show up and eat. She just kept eating and eating. “You’re going to have to work all that off before you go to bed.” I told her and she nodded. She was looking forward to that. The chief walked up to me. The whole village grew silent. I just kept eating. He stood before me. “Yes?” I asked him. He turned to the rest of the village. “July and Isaiah have defeated the demon!” He yelled. There was so much noise that I put a soundproof barrier around my head. Rya took my barrier away. I glared at her. She grinned. I looked at him as he raised his hands for silence. “I have another announcement.” He said. “We have two new shamans!” He said loudly. He waved us forward. Sam and I got up and I almost stumbled head over heels over the table. Sam caught me and held me up. There was silence for a moment and then every woman in the village started cheering and some of the men as well. A lot of the men were staring at me in dismay. Tattoos flashed around my waist and stomach. My eyes got really wide and whispered to Sam, “I think I have new tattoos.” I said to him. His eyes shined. “That means that we did the right thing.” He said. “I just got them too.” My eyes lit up and I could feel spirit swirling around me. The chief stared at me. “Calm down,” Sam whispered to me. I blushed and controlled the spirit. “If you have an issue with this you may speak to me about it.” The chief said to the village. I saw a few eyes blazing and I was ready to tell them that they could suck it. I went up to the chief. “May I speak?” I asked him. He looked absolutely shocked, but he nodded. “If you have an issue with me, me personally and not with some tradition saying that women are below men, then you can talk to me personally about it. If it’s about the tradition, maybe you need to accept that the world is seeing women in a new light now.” I said to them and the spirit I had just recently controlled filled my words with a power that had them all speechless. The chief looked at me and smiled. I went back to my seat and finished my meal. When Sam got up, I got up and we cleaned up our plates. We went to the hut and I got ready for bed and we both slept well after talking for a while. When I woke up, I grabbed some clothes and showered. I examined my new tattoos in the mirror thinking that nobody would be up and in the showers that early. I examined my whole body and saw the tattoos on my chest and waist and stomach all glistening with a hidden power and reassurance. I looked at my back and saw that my spirit tattoos were almost glowing. It was beautiful. I pulled my hair away from my neck and looked at my tattoo showing that I could control myself. “They’re so pretty,” Jenny said. I covered myself awkwardly for a second and gave up. “Yeah, I love them. They show how much I’ve grown. Each is a new change in my life.” I said to her. “I wonder what my dad would do if I got a tattoo. Not like one of yours but I want a rose on my shoulder.” She said. “Talk to him about it. I think he’s seeing the changes in society now.” I said to her. She nodded. I put on a shirt that was low enough to show my new tattoos. Then I decided I wanted to go swimming. I threw on my swimsuit. She looked at me wide eyed. “What?” I asked her. “They’ll kill you for wearing that all day.” She answered. “I did yesterday. If I want to swim, I’ll swim in what I usually swim in.” I said. She relaxed. “That’s a swimsuit? I’ve never seen anybody here wear something like that.” She said. “Yeah, because you can’t wear anything here that shows your legs. I said. She nodded. I walked out and headed to my hut. She followed me. I walked in on Isaiah talking to Sam. Isaiah stared at my new tattoos and Sam got up and kissed me. “July, can I ask you a favor?” Isaiah asked me. “Sure,” I said to him. //Will you go with me to ask the chief if I can marry Jenny?// He asked me in my mind. My whole face lit up. I nodded and grabbed a dress from my bag. Of course it ended up being a black one. I turned to Jenny. “Appropriate?” I asked her. She looked it over. “Enough so that no one will seriously call you on it.” She said. I nodded and followed Isaiah out of the hut. “What are you two doing?” She asked me. “He wants to check out the spirit realm some more. He wants to hang out in the guy’s dormitory for it though. It’s supposed to get seriously hot though.” I told her. “Can I go too?” She asked me. “It’s easier for just one person and I’m still kinda tired from bringing the whole council of elders yesterday.” I told her. We headed over to the guy’s dormitory so she’d believe us. Once she believed us, I led had Sam lead us to the chiefs’ hut. I knocked on the door and he said to come in. He was talking to his wife. I smiled to him and he smiled back. “This is July and Isaiah. They are our protectors.” He told her. She smiled and shook our hands. Isaiah was totally going to chicken out. “Isaiah has something to ask you.” I said and Isaiah went totally pale. When he stood there looking stupid with both of their faces questioning him curiously, I excused us for a moment. “Do you love her?” I asked him. He nodded. “Do you want to marry her, or go to college now?” I asked him. “I don’t even know what I want to do with my life besides marry her.” He said to me. “Then tell them. The worst they can do is say no.” I said. “And they like us anyway so I don’t think they will say no.” I told him. “Are you going to do this or not?” I demanded from him. He squared his shoulders. “I’m going to do it.” He said and he walked back in. “Um…I want to um… ask…” He said melting again. I squeezed his hand and he looked up for the first time. “I want to ask for your daughter’s hand in marriage.” He said. Both of their eyes got really wide. “You have had no engagement period to my understanding.” The chief said. “I love her and I don’t want to do anything else with my life before I marry her.” He said confidently. The chief looked shocked but he nodded. Then he stopped. “Ask her; you have my permission but ask her first. If she says no than don’t pester her.” He said. His wife looked utterly shocked. “May I speak to you, July?” She asked me. I nodded. She got up and led me another room after glancing at her husband for permission to rise. He had nodded without thinking about it. I stared at them for a moment and shook my head. “What?” She demanded taking offence. They all stared at me, her glaring. “I would never be that loyal. I can’t even take simple directions like stay here. Sam has to wrestle me to the ground and then catch me when I run. He’s pretty much given up on getting to get up first. He’s only got me telling him where I’m going because we have to know where the other is in the spirit realm. It became a habit.” I told her. She unruffled and grinned. “It took some getting used to.” She said. She took me to another room and asked me about Sam and I. I answered her truthfully, and she didn’t ask me anything that would have been something I’d have to lie about. When we left Isaiah was glowing with pride and looked like he was almost floating. “July, will you help me talk to mom?” He asked me. I laughed. “That one I’m actually scared to do myself. Sam asked me to marry him and I told him yes and I need to get around to talking to talk to her.” He looked at me shocked. He dragged me to where Sam was talking to his friends. “You did what now?” He asked him. “Isaiah!” I yelled at him he put his hand over my mouth and I tackled him to the ground. He wrestled with me. “If you dare!” I yelled at him and dragged him away. I could hear all of the guys laughing their butts off. “What did you tell him?” He asked me. “That you sort of proposed.” I said to him. I put a soundproof barrier between us and the rest of the world. “Isaiah just asked Jenny’s dad if he could marry her and the chief didn’t have an issue with it. As long as she said yes.” I said. “I was wondering what you needed to talk to him about.” Sam said. “You didn’t even get her a ring.” Isaiah said to Sam. “Uh…” Sam looked awkward. “Well, we can tell mom together then.” Isaiah said. My eyes opened wider than should have been possible. “Um… I think she’d have a heart attack at both of her youngest kids asking if they can get married at the same time.” I said. “She can handle it.” Isaiah said. “She knows we’re not facing anymore demons so she should be a bit happy.” He said. I tried to get away but they both had a good hold on me. I whimpered and they almost dragged me to where mom was talking to a bunch of her old friends. “Hey, you didn’t tell me you were gonna be a shaman!” She said to me and hugged me hard. I hugged her back. //You first.// I said to Isaiah. He went pale. //You first. You’re closer to her right now anyway.// He answered. I broke away from her. I stared him down and I could feel my hair lifting with the power of wind. My mom was staring at me. He glared too, but I am definitely more stubborn than him. He sighed. “Mom, can I talk to you?” He asked her. “Sure, you’re already talking to me.” She said hesitantly. Meaning she wasn’t moving and you’d better tell her what was going on. He started a million times and eventually he was starting to hyperventilate because he kept taking deep breaths and letting them out quickly. “Fine, you first then.” She said turning to me. I gave her a question mark look. “I know when you two are debating who has to tell me something first.” She said. I started and blew out and almost did the same thing that Isaiah had done. Her friends were trying to not laugh at us. Sam grabbed my hand I knew I could handle it. “Sam and I want to get married once we’re out of high school. We might try and get online diplomas. Normal school would be complicated with our shaman thing.” I said to her. She nodded and looked to Isaiah. I leaned into Sam hard and he held me up. I made us a couch out of the earth. Isaiah checked to make sure Jenny wasn’t around. “I want to ask Jenny to marry me.” He said to her and she just about fell out of her chair. Her friends just stared at us open mouthed. I almost laughed at their expressions but I was kind of worried about mom. “You haven’t known her very long,” She said. “But I’m as deep with her as they are,” He said nodding at us. “Do you know this for sure?” She asked him. He nodded. “When I found out I showed him.” I said. “Propose then.” She said simply. He hugged her so hard I wasn’t sure if she could breathe. When he let her go she was almost crying. She hid it the same way I do when I don’t want somebody to see me cry. She covered her face while she held it back. “So, I guess you want to go get a ring for her then?” She asked Isaiah. He nodded. We all went and loaded into the car and when we got back we had a ring that would look absolutely gorgeous on her. Isaiah was already out of school so this wouldn’t be too bad for him. It was dinner time and when he went and sat with her she wasn’t too pleased with him. “Where were you?” She asked him. “We needed to explain some things to our mom.” He said. “I’d like her to verify this.” She said. She glared at me, knowing that I’d been in on the lie too. She went and talked to my mom and my mom did verify that we’d needed to explain some things to her and that’s where we’d been most of the day. Jenny wasn’t sure whether or not to trust us. “Can we walk?” He asked her. She looked afraid. “It’s not like that.” He said and she glared at him. Then you won’t mind if we take my friends.” She said. He paled. //Coward. Sam knelt in the middle of the village on the way back from telling our older brothers we tied the knot and he didn’t care who saw.// I thought to Isaiah. “He didn’t get you one though!” Isaiah said out loud. “He still had the nerve.” I said. “And you still don’t have one. He doesn’t have the nerve to have his friends know.” Isaiah said. “He just got me one, butthead.” I retorted. “Then let’s see it.” “Let’s see yours first,” I suggested. “Make your announcement first.” Isaiah said. “Take your own advice!” I retorted. I could see Jenny starting to get annoyed. Sam grabbed my left hand and in front of everybody, asked me to marry him. The entire village stared. I said yes and thought to Isaiah, //Burn. Now suck it up.// He stared and got up. He set my plate on fire as he passed me to go get more food. I snapped my fingers and the fire was gone. I picked up a burnt chicken leg and nailed him in the head with it. Jenny smacked me for it and I grinned at her. He called water to get the grease out of his hair and approached Jenny. She didn’t know what to do so she got up so she would feel like she could run. He knelt in front of her. He took one of her hands. “Jenny, will you marry me?” He asked her. She almost fell over. She nodded, not up to talking. He whooped and kissed her. He pulled out the ring and slipped it onto her finger. “Wait, don’t we have to ask our parents?” She asked him finding her voice. “What do you think I’ve been doing all day?” He asked her. This time she kissed him. The entire village just stared at our table. Two proposals at one table and the same night; new record. All of her friends started asking about her ring and she brought her hand out of Isaiah’s to show hers off. He held her and she was so happy she ended up crying. Isaiah pulled her into his lap and kissed her forehead. When she started crying her friends changed their focus to me. I rolled my eyes and showed them my ring. It was beautiful but simple. It had a gem for each element set in silver. It looked beautiful against my darkened skin. When Sam rose, Isaiah rose and we all got up. We went back to our own tents. In the morning I woke up to Rya grumbling. “They’re sending us all back to school and enrolling Jenny. This is so stupid.” She said. I stared at her in shock. “You’re kidding right?” I asked her. “Sadly, no.” She said. I rolled my eyes. “Today?” I asked her. She nodded. Ugh. I prodded Sam until he woke up. “Yeah?” He asked me. “We’re being forced to go back to school.” I told him. He sighed. He got out of bed and grabbed some clothes. I grabbed a shirt not caring which. It was dirty so I had water clean it while I walked to the showers. Jenny was getting ready too. “Have you ever been to public school?” I asked her. “I stopped going to this school this year. I hated it.” She said. I showered and fixed my hair. She was about to go in a tribal dress. I grabbed her and took her to my room. I gave her a tank top and a normal shirt. I threw her some jeans. “Go put them on and you might hate school a little less.” I told her. She frowned but put them on. She looked in the mirror of spirit air and water I made. “I look like a normal girl, a city girl.” She said surprised. “Yeah. School’s not so bad if you fit in.” I said to her. She nodded. I came over and told her to close her eyes and put some eyeliner and mascara on her. She opened her eyes and she was shocked. “That is amazing. It took you ten minutes to make me look like a normal high school girl.” She said. I nodded and put on my own makeup. She looked at me and nodded. Jenny held Rya down while I put makeup on her and when everybody was ready to go, we loaded into my mom’s van and we drove to school. When my friends saw me they swarmed. “Where have you been?” One of the guys asked. “Getting a hold on my life,” I said sounding bored. “You got a tattoo!” One of the girls shouted. They all crowded and stared at the tattoo on my chest. It was seriously awkward. “How did you get your hair to stay dyed for that many showers?” Another girl said and started playing with my hair and saw the tattoo on my neck. “How many tattoos did you get?” She asked me. They all crowded to see my tattoos. “A few.” I said and tried to get out of the crowd and they saw my ring and questioned that too. “I have to get to class!” I nearly yelled at them. “Let’s skip!” One guy suggested. “I’ve skipped enough for now.” I said weaving through the people with Indian grace. Sam was glued to my side the entire time. He followed me with a skill that had me gawking at him. He turned me around and pointed me to class. I walked in and a bunch of boos started up when I walked in. Rya was behind me, in partial tribal wear. “Where’s the other new chick?” One of the guys asked me. “She’s a senior.” I answered him with a patience that seemed too old. We sat in the front and they started throwing stuff at us. Rya turned around and glared at them and I just looked like I couldn’t care less. The teacher started talking and I’d already learned this subject before but Rya hadn’t. I couldn’t pass notes with her because she was so enthralled with it. //Sam, are you focusing?// I asked him. //No. I’m already five pages ahead in the science book and they’re reading aloud. I already did the assignment.// He answered. //Sweet. So we can talk?// I asked him. //Yep.// He answered. Eventually the other kids stopped flicking stuff at me because I wasn’t reacting. They all focused on Rya. She looked like she was ready to burn them. I talked to Sam till lunch. When I sat down with him all of my friends sat with us. Jenny and Isaiah sat next to us, and Rya and Qwen sat on the other side of us. Rya was complaining about no t being able to get the crap out of her hair and Jenny complained about being ahead of the other kids and getting too much attention. She complained all of this to Isaiah. He held her and all of my friends gasped. Isaiah was the shy kid who couldn’t even touch another guy to stop him to talk. He held her with confidence. They all stared and I snuggled into Sam. He held me gently. Qwen had Rya in his arms while she complained. Some of the popular girls came over looking interested. They scooted my crowd out of the way and sat down. Sam bent down and kissed me not even noticing them. Isaiah was murmuring into Jenny’s ear. He did an imitation of me fighting with Rya and she laughed so hard she almost fell off her chair. He caught her and pulled her into his lap. The girls across the table gawked. “Hey Isaiah, why don’t you greet our new pals,” I said and he looked up and almost fell off his seat by himself and Jenny’s extra weight had him and her on the ground. She was on top of him and they just grinned. A piece of earth tipped Sam and I and we ended up next to them. I grinned and sat on Isaiah’s stomach. Jenny tackled me and we rolled around. She was tickling me so much I almost peed myself. Sam fended her off for me and I ran to the bathroom. When I was done I rushed back to the table and poked at the rubberish macaroni. The girls were watching me like I was a science project. I ignored them and tried to spear some of my food. Isaiah bumped my arm kinda hard and I accidentally sloshed some of the macaroni at the girls across from me. It went down one girls’ shirt and she screamed. “What the hell? Why would you throw macaroni down my shirt?”She yelled on the top of her lungs and threw some at me and I dodged easily. She kept throwing food at me until I left the room. Sam, Isaiah, Qwen, Rya and Jenny followed. All of the girls’ friends were ganging up on me. I turned and walked away with all of mine close behind me. They were slightly afraid so they walked a little faster than me. A bunch of the guys tried to jump on me but I sped up at just the right time so that they dog piled on each other. More guys tried to get me and I just kept dodging them. Then they started insulting me. I gave myself a soundproof bubble. I imagined that they hadn’t ever had somebody not cry when they started insulting them because they just stopped and stared at me. I looked around me and there wasn’t anything out of the ordinary visible. I looked up and there was this huge clump of mold above me. I just kept walking and they just sat there. When I caught up with the rest of my group, half of them were crying. “What’s wrong?” I asked them. “Didn’t you hear what they were saying about us? How we’ll never fit in and how we were all freaks and our culture is obsolete?” Jenny said, sobbing. “No, I put up a soundproof barrier because they don’t know us and they don’t know our culture or who we are. They don’t know what they’re talking about; they are just trying to break us down to hurt us so we don’t mess with them. They couldn’t hurt me so I don’t think they’ll ever mess with me. Be strong.” I told her. She nodded and stopped crying. Rya was sobbing into Qwen’s shoulder. “Come on, we have all of the rest of the day together.” I said with them. “Yeah but those girls are in the same classes.” Isaiah said. “Let’s go or they’ll think they can chase us out of school.” I said and they followed me up to our next class. We sat in the back of class and talked about the village and wedding plans. Rya told me that she wanted to have kids as soon as she could graduate high school. I nodded, understanding her wish. I looked at Sam. “Maybe in like three years, but not right away.” I said appraising him. He nodded. “We’re both mature enough to deal with it. Did you hear how loud that girl screamed though? I haven’t heard anything like it unless somebody feared for their life. I don’t remember anybody screaming that loud when that demon showed up.” He said. “You came close,” I said and he glared at me. I pinned his foot under the desk and an epic game of footsie commenced. “How do you think we’re going to get by without getting yelled at for public displays of affection?” Jenny asked me. “By not caring.” I said. She laughed. “We’re all getting…” I pointed at my ring and she nodded. “They won’t punish us beyond a lecture and then we’ll go PDA all over the village to mess with them.” I said and she laughed. “Don’t kiss him in school, ‘okay’ and we’ll start kissing.” I said laughing. I kissed Sam and then jumped when Rya smacked me across the back. “Ow!” I complained. “No PDA,” She said grinning. I laughed. “You don’t tell on me and I won’t tell on you,” I said and she kissed Qwen. “Snake!” I yelled and Rya and Isaiah squaked and got their feet off the ground. I almost laughed myself sick. I was crying so hard that when the girls got in they thought they’d won. “That’s why you don’t mess with us,” one of the girls said snootily. I got an idea. “Snake!” I yelled and pointed into the corner and had water and air make a snake. The girls all screamed and got up on their chairs. I stopped as soon as somebody came into the room to investigate and went into the spirit realm to keep from getting blamed for laughing so hard. When I came back to the real world Rya and Sam were still muffling chuckles. The girls all glared at me. I made my eyes wide and innocent. The teacher brought class in session and I spent most of class playing footsie with Sam. Isaiah and Jenny were doing the same thing and Rya and Qwen were discussing what they were going to do now that they were human. They discussed through notes baby names and laws on age discrimination amongst the eligible to be elders. “What are you two writing so furiously back there? I hope it’s notes.” The teacher asked and they nodded. “Really, read them to the class then.” He said. “We have decided that Charles would be a really awkward name for a baby.” Rya said and the entire class laughed. The teacher glared and made them put the paper away. I reached an arm out to Rya and she took it, grabbing Qwen’s hand. I took us to the spirit realm and we talked for a while. Then they came to a decision and tied their sashes together. We came back to the real world and the teacher was glaring at me. “Huh?” I said, rubbing my eyes. “Can you really sleep sitting up?” he asked me. I nodded and he sat down. “Well, there’s a new one. Am I really that boring?” He asked me. “Not usually but I didn’t sleep that much last night so…” I said and grabbed Sam’s hand and he blushed. He covered his face quickly enough so that nobody saw him. Jenny leaned over and said to me, “You were talking about donkeys on unicycles and the great banana taming the hippocampi before Hermioni got her foot stuck in a toaster. Loud enough for most of the class to hear so they were all staring at you.” She said. I burst out laughing so hard that I fell out of my chair. I lay on the ground laughing for five minutes straight as the entire class laughed. The teacher gave up and started reading. I talked to Jenny for a long time and Isaiah started joking and imitating me talking about the great banana and the hippocampi. We were all laughing so hard that we had to sit on the floor to keep cuncussions from happening. We all laughed and joked for the rest of the class period. Rya was refusing to get up so I picked her up. We walked through the hall like that and most of the people just stared. I put her down about halfway to class. “Catch me!” I yelled to Sam and he caught me and carried me for a while. Rya tried the same thing and Qwen let her drop. He was so deep into discussion with Isaiah that he didn’t notice until he tripped over Rya. She looked seriously pissed and he laughed harder than I’d ever seen him laugh. She couldn’t stay mad at him but she glared at me in Sam’s arms. He put me down when the principle came out and yelled at us. We went through the rest of the day sort of like this. When we got back to the village we all went to our own huts. At dinner we all ate together discussing the days’ events. We all agreed that the cafeteria food was food poisoning waiting to happen. We decided to sneak some food in the morning. The next morning Rya came bursting into my room. “I feel weird.” She said to me. I grabbed her and pulled her down and called the elements to heal her. After five minutes I asked her if she felt better and she shook her head. “Do you have your period?” I asked her. She her head. “I always had it on the third week, never the first week of the month.” She said. I focused on my spirit and brought her to the spirit realm. There was a little red dot on her stomach. I didn’t understand it so I brought us back. She didn’t understand it either. I woke up Sam and asked him. “On you?” He asked looking panicked. “On Rya,” I said taking his panic as a bad thing. I looked at her woreidly. “Well, I guess you wanted one so bad.” He said and grinned. She looked confused. “You’re gonna have a kid.” He said. She fainted. I went and grabbed Qwen. She was awake when we got to the hut. She was questioning Sam and he was sure. He’d gone to the spirit realm and made sure. She saw Qwen and burst out, “We’re having a baby!” I have never seen his face light up with such excitement he picked her up and twirled her around and whooping. I heard a lot of yelled shut ups. It was only like five in the morning. I watched them get excited and had to calm them down. We all had to go to school regardless and the teachers could not get them to be still. At lunch they were all but doing flips around the cafeteria. I rolled my eyes and snuggled into Sam. He held me happily. The popular girls came and sat with us. “Why are they so wound up?” One of the girls asked. “They’re not going to have to come next year. They both get to graduate early.” I said and their eyes got really wide. “And when did that one kid get a girlfriend and stop being shy?” Another girl asked. “That one kid is my brother and his name is Isaiah. He got a girlfriend when he felt like it and he wasn’t all that shy when people weren’t making fun of him.” I said harshly. They nodded not really listening. Jenny had Isaiah almost in a stranglehold she was kissing him so deeply. You could tell they had some serious chemistry. The girls who normally make fun of me came up from behind me and popped Sam in the back of the head hard. He knocked his head hard into my shoulder and I turned around in his lap, fluttering my hands around him like an overly protective mother, wishing I could heal him right then and there and he warned me with his eyes. They went to hit him again and I put my arms over him protectively. I could tell he felt like a dweeb with his girlfriend protecting him like this. “What, are you going to try and protect him? You think we couldn’t handle you?” One of the girls said. I slid out of Sam’s lap and got in her face. “I know I can handle you; back, off.” I said and spirit added power to my words that had everybody surrounding us staring. The girl tried to hit me and I grabbed her hand and flipped her. On her back I put my foot in her stomach at the right position so that it was on her lungs or whatever. It would make it hard to breathe and that’s what I was going for. “Don’t touch him.” I said and there was anger in my voice that frightened her beyond words. I got off of her and she ran behind her pack of friends. “I can do so much worse, don’t mess with me.” I said and they all backed off. I climbed back into Sam’s lap. “Are you okay?” I asked him. He gawked at me and nodded. I snuggled into him and he held me. I kissed him and everybody was still staring at us. He kissed me willingly and I snuggled deeper into his arms. He held me and I closed my eyes and imagined being in our village. I imagined being in my moccasins and my favorite dress, him holding me next to the water, sleeping in his arms. I felt a bit of power starting to swirl around me. I looked up and told it to calm down. This pattern repeated in some ways till the next Monday. By then the novelty of being back in school had worn off and I had to start learning again. The teachers started seeing my new maturity and the power I spoke with when people messed with me or my friends from the village. As I became more involved with my friends from the village my old friends stopped being with us. They didn’t care about them as much and with me just wanting to be with Sam, and the rest of my friends from the village coupling off, they just gave up. The teachers noticed the power that I walked with and so did the other students. They admired my tattoos and my grace. My new confidence never went unnoticed. The popular girls kept trying to break it down and when they failed each time they stopped. I went to the bathroom during math one day and washed my face. After having one particularly saliva challenged boy tell me off for dissing his girlfriend when I hadn’t said anything to his girlfriend and the popular girls had told them both otherwise, I looked in the mirror. I saw my face and almost fell on my butt. I looked like I was as ancient as Rya but youthful enough to still be a threat. I looked ancient and powerful and somebody to be feared. I looked like I was somebody who needed to be respected or they’d show you what to respect. I grinned and a youthful look came to my ancient eyes. My eyes weren’t wrinkle but you could see the ancient sadness there. The gray streak added to the ancient look and I looked wise and knowing. I left and ran into one of the popular girls on my way back to class. Then I saw the rest of her group. “So, you think you can insult us?” She said. I felt pity take over my face with a brute force that I couldn’t stop it. She looked confused. She seemed so young and…just so shallow. Her friend surrounded me. I tried to walk away but they blocked me. “Come on; one on one fight.” She said. I shook my head. I tried to get out. “It’s not a choice.” She said and took a swing at me. I ducked easily. Then she started doing karate kicks and punches and I had to dodge a little faster. I was not in the mood to put up with their crap. I backed up to one side, letting her think she was pushing me back. I took two steps to one side and ran at her crowd. They all stood firm and I flipped over them with an agility that had them all staring. I walked back to class. “It took you that long to use the rest room?” My teacher asked me. I looked at the clock and fifteen minutes had passed. Some of the kids muffled laughter. I shrugged. She called me into the hall. “What were you doing?” She asked me. “I went to the bathroom and then some people stopped me to talk.” I said with a bored voice. I could tell she didn’t believe me. “What do you think I was doing then?” I asked her. This surprised her. She was probably in her second year teaching. Nobody had asked her what she thought they’d been doing. “I… uh…” She stuttered. “When you decide what you thought I was doing you can talk to me about it. I have work to do.” I said to her and she watched amazed as I went back to class. I sat back down and another kid came over and smacked me across the back of the head. I turned around and glared at them. “Have you got something to say to me?” The chick asked me. “Yeah. Don’t ever hit me.” I said. She slapped me across the face and I stood up. She looked slightly afraid now. I’m bigger than most people now. Since I’d been chosen I’d filled out to my full potential. Then she got even more pissed and tried to slap me again and I caught her hand. I bent it back at the most painful angle I could and she was kneeling in front of me after a second, silent tears of pain coursing down her face. “Never, ever hit me. It’s a dangerous thing to do.” I said and spirit magnified my voice into a powerfully frightening monotone. I grabbed her by the shirt and plopped her back down into her chair and went back to mine. Everybody in the class was staring at me. I finished my work and left the room. The teacher just stared at me when she walked in and I walked out. She didn’t try to stop me and she didn’t try to ask me why I was leaving. I went to my pond and sat for a while in my bra and jeans. I lay there for a few hours and Sam showed up. “Bad day?” he asked me. I nodded. “The popular girls are trying to get me killed and they are utterly incapable of that. Honestly if a demon thousands of years old can’t kill me then I don’t think they can.” I said. “I wonder what would happen if I told them that?” I asked him. He doubled up laughing. “They’d put you in a loony bin.” He said when he could breathe again. “Then they’d have to catch me.” I said with a grin. “If I can catch you, I think they’ll be able to.” He said. I grinned and started running. He kept up easily and I ran faster. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep up much long so he sped up and tackled me to the ground. “Gotcha!” He yelled triumphantly. I rolled over and kissed him. And then melted into the ground. “Hey, come on, that’s cheap.” He complained. “Are you all there, lover boy?” I heard one of the girls from the school entering. “Are you?” I asked her throwing my shirt back on. She jumped and spun. She took out a pocketknife and held it like a dagger. She looked afraid. “Put that down. Nobody is looking for a fight, just trying to get away from people.” I said to her and she looked even more frightened. Sam pointed behind me and there was a big shadow rising out of the ground. I went into the spirit realm and found the demon there. “What do you want?” I yelled at it. “My spirit free!” It yelled at me in my mind. It could speak through your mind. “How am I supposed to do that?” I asked it. “Are you not a shaman? Shouldn’t you know?” It asked me. I called Sam into the spirit realm through our mental bond. When he showed up he almost attacked it but I held him back. “How do we free it of this realm?” I asked him. “You cut every tie it has to the real world.” He said. I saw ropes and bindings around it and approached it. It ran away from me and tried to attack me from afar. “Do you want to get out of here or not?” I asked it. It stopped attacking me. I called the elements to me and started cutting the bindings. Once they were all cut the demon shrank. It became my size and transformed into a human. The man in front of me seemed centuries old, but physically my mom’s age. The girl fainted. I went over to her and tried something I’d never done before. I got into her head and erased her memory of this place. When it was gone I came back into the real world. I picked her up and brought her to her car and drove her to the school. I put her in the drivers’ seat. I spirited away and called Rya to me. She and Qwen came and when they saw the man they both went up and hugged him. “This was my best friend. He disappeared after going to war with me.” Qwen said. I went into the spirit realm and looked into the man’s memories. I saw all of them at once and comprehended them all at once and all of his emotions at once. I was forced back into my body. “You were captured and made into that being. You wanted Rya and Qwen to be with you but couldn’t think of anything besides keeping them alive until you were human again. That was the only way you could think of to keep them alive.” I said. He nodded. He was a truly good man. He mourned for the loss he suffered. I felt different somehow. I looked down and my tattoos had burned holes in my clothes outlining the tattoos. There were tattoos on my legs now and it was amazing. Sam, Rya, Qwen and the man all stared at me. “Well, I’m July,” I said to him and stuck out my hand. “I’m Josia,” He told me. I nodded. //Do you trust him?// I asked Rya. //It feels weird that he would do that to us but to see all of your friends die would hurt a lot. We had to deal with it, and the fact that we couldn’t have kids after five years. We had three kids in that time and then… I stopped being able to.// She said. I hugged her. //You’re going to have one now so the past is the past.// I told her and her whole face lit up. I learned the texture of my ring and was happy for her. We all walked a long ways. When we got to the village my mom took it upon herself to reacquaint him with the village. She was really talkative and I hadn’t seen her with that kind of light in her eyes before. Or at least not that I could remember. I was ready to go to bed right away. I threw off my oddly burned clothes and climbed into bed. I woke up in Sam’s arms as usual. I got up and went to find my older brothers. I threw on some clothes and my tattoos burned through them like they had with my other clothes. I glared at them and gave up. I went into the guy’s dormitory and woke them up by tripping over a couple of mats that were awqwardly placed in front of the door. I yelled as I fell over the two sleeping bodies. Half of the male population of the village sat up and glared at me. The two sleeping forms were two women. They grumbled at me and rolled over and kept sleeping. I eventually made my way over to my brothers. They looked extremely embarassed. “What?” I asked them. “You’re not supposed to be in here anymore. You’ve accepted a marriage proposal.” My oldest brother said. “Too bad. You all know I’m not cheating or anything so get over it.” I said. Sam came in after that comment and grabbed me. He looked seriously pissed and tried to drag me out. I couldn’t keep my temper under control. I burned him. He let out a shocked gasp and dropped my wrist. He looked hurt but I was seriously pissed. “I couldn’t care less if this is disrespectful. I’m trying to talk to my brothers and I probably won’t see them until tonight so leave me alone.” I said. Everybody in the room stared at me in shock. Sam looked like he wanted to cry. I was briefly confused. Then I just couldn’t be around them anymore so I had the earth engulf me. I thought for a long time and then went to Rya’s hut. “Rya?” I asked her, knocking on her door. “Come in,” she said sleepily. I explained to her what had happened and she stared at me aghast. “You just accidently broke your engagement.” She told me. My surprise quickly turned to sorrow. I sobbed into her shoulder and she held me. “I just wanted to talk to my brothers! I haven’t even told them about the engagement and I wanted them to watch mom today. She’s acting so weird around Josiah, I just want them to tell me what’s going on with her. I wanted Sam to leave me alone for awhile. I don’t need to be connected at his hip all day. I need to talk to my family too.” I sobbed into her shoulder. “Why do all the traditions here have to be so confusing? Why does this village have so many rules about how I can act?” I asked her. She held me and let me cry myself out. I went to shower and saw my hair. My silver streak was getting a bit wider now. I got into some traditional village clothes and my tattoos didn’t bother this dress. I went back to Rya and asked her what I should do. “Do you want to marry him still?” She asked me. I nodded. “He’ll move back into the guy’s dormitory and you’ll have to sleep at his feet tonight. It’s seriously degrading. Been there and done that with Qwen, but he always took me back.” She said. I gave her a look that said I wasn’t going to stoop that low. She laughed. “That’s the same look and thought I had when my mom told me that. Seriously, that’s how it works.” She said. I crawled into her bed and slept to pass the day. Around noon I got out of bed. I go and ask Rya were an ax and the logs are. She gave me a curious look. “Why?” She asked me. “I feel like splitting wood.” I said. She gave me a curious look. She directed me to the wood pile. There were guys around and when I picked up an ax they laughed. “You think that you can do that without help?” One guy asked me. I flipped him off and brought the ax down hard on the wood. I split wood for a good hour so I feel like I’ve gotten all of my aggression out. They watch me amazed. When I was done with the big pile I brought I left. I climbed trees for a good long time and then dived off of the highest tree that I could. The feeling was exhilarating. I heard a few screams as people thought I was commiting suicide but I opened the earth and traveled underground to the lake. I burst up in the deepest part and swam. I took off my dress and told the water to carry it back to shore. I did laps around the lake until I couldn’t move. Then I got my dress back on and went back to the village. I ate dinner alone and cleaned my plate with people staring at me. I watched mom for a while and then I couldn’t take it anymore. I went and found my oldest brother. “You were engaged to him?” He asked me when I approached him. “Yeah, and I didn’t know that I broke the engagement until Rya told me that what I’d done would break it.” I said sounding annoyed. “Have you seen how mom’s acting around Josia?” I asked him. “Yeah, she’s acting the same way she acted when she met your dad. After mine died.” He said. I almost fell over. “I knew she was acting weird, but I didn’t even consider something like that. I was thinking it was excessive guilt or something, for, like, deserting the village for twenty years.” I said shocked. I had a sudden burst of energy. “I need to run or something,” I said and turned around. I was running as fast as I could and then I decided to get Rya. “Will you spar with me?” I asked her. She nodded and knocked me off of my feet. We had a full out war that left me so tired I almost blacked out. She steadied me and I sagged into her. “How much have you eaten today?” She asked me. “A couple of apple slices for dinner.” I said. Her eyes got really wide. “Starving yourself isn’t going to help anything.” She said. She dragged me to the kitchen and grabbed me some turkey. She made me a sandwhich and when I turned it away she forced me to eat it. After she was done force feeding me I felt a bit better. I was definitely ready for bed so I headed to the hut. It was empty. I sat outside of it weeping. I was completely silent but I couldn’t stop the shaking of my shoulders. I ran far. I was too tired to run but I forced myself farther and farther. I got to the car and wished I was home. I spirited myself there. I took a shower and the empty house frightened me. I raided the fridge and ate all the junk food I could get a hold on. It was one in the morning and I was watching movies when I realized that it wouldn’t get any better than this hurt without him. I went upstairs and made myself utterly me. I put on dark makeup and deep red lip gloss. I put on a traditional tribe dress and moccasins. I did my hair up like I used to, and I did my nails black. Each piece of my outfit represented me, in different times of my life and different aspects of who I was. My gray streak hung loose from the gorgeous updo I’d done and my makeup made it look like I was…not anything but me. Nobody could copy me or the way I felt and looked. My eyes were bloodshot and there was so much pain in them it hurt to look at. The ancient sadness was no longer hinted at, it was the dominant feature on my face. I was blocking everything in my mind from Sam. I saw the promise of wisdom in my silver and the promise of disobedient stamped with my makeup. I saw the village and my role in it in the way I was dressed and the person I was in my hair. It was done up with a red clip accenting it to show that I wasn’t high in normal societal standards. I put on a necklace that symbolized my love for my family; a necklace that they had all pitched in to buy me when mom hadn’t had enough money with her at the mall. My nails were done with the colors of the elements and the ring stayed on my finger. I studied myself and I saw who I really was. I was a hurt girl with more power than she had ever asked for and would probably never use. That was why it was given to me. I wouldn’t abuse it. I spirited myself back to the village. I got into the guy’s dorm without a problem. I found Sam and curled up next to his feet. It felt wrong to be by his feet, like he should walk on me, but it felt right in a way that said that it was his choice to take me back or step on my pride and leave me there. I didn’t mind. I was asleep in minutes. I woke up to a lot of whispering. Sam was staring at me with disbelief. The rest of the guys were wondering at my outfit. The night hit me and I ran out. As soon as I was outside I hurled up all the junk food I’d eaten. I hurt bad, but I didn’t mind. I called water wash my mouth out and asked the earth to soak up the mess I’d made. I poked my head back in and they were all staring at me with even stranger looks on their faces. I turned and threw up some more. As my stomach heaved I heard Sam come out. He looked awqward at my position. I hurled up more chips and icecream. He came forward and held my silver streak of hair so it didn’t get dirty. I told the earth to soak up this mess too and called water to wash my mouth out. I reached up to kiss him, but he pulled away and went back into the dormitory. I ran. I ran and ran. I ran all the way home. The empty house still bothered me but I didn’t care. I took all my clothes off and the makeup and I got into bed. My bare skin felt good against the blankets. I cried myself to sleep. I woke up and I was still alone. I don’t know what I expected, but I hadn’t expected to be alone. I got in the shower and washed away all my tears. I shaved for the first time in weeks and I felt new again. I brushed my teeth and my hair. I went downstairs and I made myself food. Healthy food this time. It was about three and I just couldn’t go back to the village. I felt my heart breaking at the thought and it wasn’t a metaphor. My chest hurt with a real pain that pierced me. I cried out with the pain. Nobody was there to hold me, nobody was going to comfort me. I went and ran about ten miles and I could feel my body burning. But it was faint so I pushed it to twenty miles. My body wouldn’t be ignored anymore so I sat down. My feet hurt bad, but I was only feeling the pain in my chest and my broken heart. I didn’t know where I was so I spirited myself back home. I started cleaning. I cleaned up the mess I’d made the night before and dusted and vacumed and while I still could I cleaned all the carpets. I dusted and I scrubed every surface in the house. I cleaned my room and watched a movie and did my makeup and hair the same way as I had last night after showering. It was two in the morning when I spirited myself to the same spot as last night and I slept curled at his feet. I woke up to murmurs and looked to Sam. He still shook his head and tears coursed down my face. I couldn’t speak so I ran again. Nobody tried to stop me. I ran all the way home again and slept. I woke up and realized that I didn’t have anything I could do today. I turned on some music and started painting. I used to paint all the time, but I’d grown out of it. I painted everything I was feeling in me and by the end of the day I was satisfied with my painting. It was beautiful. I let it dry for an hour or two as I made myself a feast and ate. When I finished eating and cleaning up after myself I grabbed the painting and started walking. I walked back to the village and put the painting in Rya’s room with a note as to where it came from and telling her that I didn’t know what to do with it. I curled up at Sam’s feet again and slept. I woke up to murmurs and looked at Sam. He shook his head again and the pain reflected in my eyes must have shocked him because he reached out to me. I reached back but he pulled away before I couldn’t touch him. My eyes welled up with tears. I ran home again and slept. It was becoming a routine. Today I wrote my pain. I wrote a million poems of the pain, the gut twisting pain and the chest ache that was there no matter how busy I made myself. I wrote of my body’s ache to be held. I didn’t know what to do with these either. I didn’t want them in my room to stare me through and remind me in my sleep. I brought them to Rya as she slept and left her a note telling her why I was dumping all of these on her. I curled up at his feet again. I woke up to murmuring again and looked to Sam. He just stared at me. I reached out to him and he cringed away from me. It hurt and then a pain so intense I nearly screamed ran through me. I ran out of there. I found Rya. She saw the insane look in my eyes. She took me underground and made me a soundproof bubble and sat with me. I screamed on the top of my lungs. She poked her in and I begged her to kill me. Her eyes got really wide and she asked me when the last time I’d been to the spirit realm had been. I grabbed her and brought us to the spirit realm. Sam and I’s connection was just as strong as ever but my spirit seemed to be cracking; breaking. She asked me to bring her back and I did. I rocked back and forth. She took me to her hut and I rocked there for a long time with unbearable sobs. I could feel my heart tearing in a million pieces. It was hitting me so hard that I wanted to claw my heart out. I was breaking from the inside out and I just wanted to break faster. I wanted it to go away. I heard the hut door open but my panicking eyes couldn’t see anything. I grabbed a piece of paper and I drew my pain. It was amazingly good and I kept going. I was still rocking but I wasn’t on the verge of screaming. I wrote and I could hear again. I summoned fire. I tried to burn myself but I wouldn’t burn. I couldn’t burn. I sobbed harder and wished to die with all of me. “This is what playing her like this is doing to her!” Rya screamed. My eyes focused on something. Sam; the anguish in his face hurt but not more than mine. My chest was being ripped apart. He surged forward and held me. I squeezed him so hard that I don’t think he could breath and I wouldn’t let go. He held me and stroked me. He stared at my art and seemed to comprehend what he’d put me through. I took out every barrier in my mind. They both screamed. Sam held me so tight and cried into me. Rya stared at me with insane eyes. They knew my pain. Sam kissed me and I didn’t let him break away for a long time. Rya slept and we held each other. At dinner we ate together and it was the first time the village had seen me in four days. I could see a tense mood spread throughout all of them. “You let her get to you? Dude, she’s not good enough for you.” One of the guys said. “You didn’t feel what she was feeling. I did. She took down the barriers and it was no wonder why she was breaking, going crazy. I don’t think I could handle any more of that than the hour I felt it with her as she realized I was taking her back. It was… hell; worse than hell.” Sam said. “I don’t know how she didn’t kill herself.” He said. “I thought about it three times an hour.” I said. This information shocked him. “She’s obviously exaggerating.” The guy said. I grabbed his hand. I forced my memory of being in the ground with Rya. He blacked out. “What did you do to him?” His friend demanded. “I showed him how I felt a couple of hours ago.” I said. “I can take and share memories at will.” I said half hysterical. Sam held me close. My silver streak had gotten thicker and kind of poofed out. It was seriously getting thick. When they guy came to, he looked at me and nodded. He understood that he had no right to criticize. Sam led me back to the hut after dinner and he discussed my painting with me for a while. When I started crying he made me feel better in ways that finally told him me he was mine.